


You've Begun to Feel Like Home

by orphan_account



Series: WICKED Home for Troubled Children [1]
Category: The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: :), Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Blow Jobs, Fluff, Hand Jobs, Multi, Rimming, Sexual Assault, Slow Burn, Smut, Suicide Attempt, child abuse tw, foster home au, minor pairing, platonic!minewt, platonic!thomesa, platonic!thominho, questionable!minresa, rape tw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-29
Updated: 2015-07-04
Packaged: 2018-03-09 12:55:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 20
Words: 31,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3250436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Brenda didn't like the idea, hated it in fact.<br/>At the same time, she would do anything to keep as many kids as possible safe.<br/>--<br/>OR the one where Brenda and Jorge become fosters parents to some kids that have seriously troubling pasts and try to make everything okay.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Alby

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [For the Life Unlived](https://archiveofourown.org/works/856065) by [ColeTReed](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ColeTReed/pseuds/ColeTReed). 



> Inspired by the Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunters HomeHunters series by ColeTReed! :) Shout out to konnicide for practically making me read the 200,000+ word fic!  
> For anybody who doesn't know, "baby bonus" is a thing where the government gives money to a family monthly per each child they have under the age of 16. I'm not sure if it's just a thing in Canada, so if it IS then I guess this fic takes place in Canada :)

“Never have I seen children so malnourished.” Mr Janson complained loudly, glancing down at the sleeping children behind Brenda’s desks. Brenda hummed in acknowledgment and wondered once again why Mr Janson- or Rat Man as many children grew to them as know him as- would ever get involved in this sort of career. He certainly wasn’t the most compassionate person, and how he’d ever gotten seniority was something Brenda would never, ever understand.

Two small, dark skinned children slept, the boy having his arms wrapped tightly around the girl. They were both so thin that Brenda suspected that she could wrap her hands around both their waists at the same time. They both had long, black hair that was in desperate need of care, though that should not be the largest concern. Their faces were shrunken and lifeless, and Brenda could see where their bones connected on their arms.

“Looks as though they haven’t eaten a proper meal in years.” She commented quietly, feeling her stomach drop in horror at the simple sight of these neglected children. This was the hardest part of the job, knowing that even though these children had been taken from the toxic home they’d lived in, that they would never be the carefree, happy children that they deserved to be. Knowing that by the time help was giving to them, that they were already beyond broken. These children were Albert and Alexandria Edwards, and they’d been a file on Brenda’s desks for way too long. It was been a reported case from Alexandria’s third grade teacher, concerned that the small girl was so thin and never had a lunch to eat at school. Brenda had been worried, too, she always was- but there didn’t seem be any reports of physical abuse towards the child. She hadn’t even known that Alexandria had a brother until they’d gone into check things out. Looking at the kids now, she deeply regretted putting the case on the back burner.

“Don’t beat yourself up about it, Garcia. I know that the Newton case was at the top of your list, and I wouldn’t expect it to be any other way.” Mr Janson said, his voice sounding surprisingly soft and Brenda wouldn’t have believed that he could sound so considerate if she hadn’t heard it herself.

“I still don’t know where they took the damn kid.” Brenda spoke quietly still, but felt the angry bubble up inside her when the image of the long haired blond boy with the soft brown eyes covered in scars and bruises came to mind. “I just wish we’d taken him when he had the chance.”

“You know how protocol works, Garcia. If you’d gone in there and taken him that day, he very well could have gone back to this parents within in the week.” Mr Janson reached down and scooped up the sleeping boy, Brenda inspired to do the same with Alexandria. She chose to ignore Mr Janson’s comment about protocol, (because fuck protocol, really when it came to saving the life of eight-year-old boy) and let her mind go back to two sick children before her.

“Do we know what we’re doing with them, yet? Where are they going?” Mr Janson paused for a moment, shifting under the weight from the boy and glanced over his shoulder at Brenda.

“That’s sort of what I wanted to talk to you about, Garcia. Your husband had a pretty decent idea not too long ago...”

xxxx

_“Jorge... You can’t let this be the end of you.” Brenda sighed, starting across the table at her husband. Since the “incident”, she’d watched the light leave his eyes and a darkness take over the once friendly yet highly sarcastic face. She couldn’t understand what had gone wrong and no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn’t get husband back. “Think of all the people you’ve saved!”_

_Jorge blinked slowly, looking up at her with a pitiful look in his dark, brown eyes. “Brenda, I love you more than anything in this world but you’ve got to understand. I can’t do this anymore, can’t watch more children die.”_

_“We save so many more than we loose!” Brenda continued to plead._

_"We both know that’s not true, I just- I can’t anymore. I’m sorry, I resign.” Jorge directed his last words towards Mr Janson, who was staring at him thoughtfully. Brenda had fully expected Mr Janson to reject resignation and tell the man to buck up and live with what had happened._

_"Well, I can honestly say this will be a great loss to this department, Gar-”_

_“NO!” Brenda shouted, jumping up from the table. “You’ve wanted to help children your whole life, ever since what happened to your family! I’m not going to let up give up on dreams just because something bad happened to one case! It wasn’t your fault! It wasn’t!”_

_Jorge sighed, his body full of pain. “I’m not going to stop helping kids, Bren. I’ve decided that this- taking them away from people who hurt and giving them to more people who can hurt them- isn’t enough for me anymore.”_

_Brenda blinked, not sure where her husband was going with this. Mr Janson glanced back and forth between the couple, looking mildly interested (which said a lot, since it was Mr Janson). “I’d like to open up a Safe Home.” Jorge said, a slight bit of the familiar and deeply missed happiness slipping back into his voice. “Take in children that would otherwise get lost in the system and end up worse off then they all already are. Give them somewhere to belong.”_

_Brenda stared at him as though he’d spontaneously turned in a fire-breathing dragon._

 

xxx

“You actually considered that load of shit?” Brenda gasped, forcing herself to keep her voice down as to not wake up the children. “First off, shouldn’t they be going to hospital right now?”

 “Medics already checked them out, they’ll definitely need to spend some serious time with some doctors over the next few months but unless they’re unable to eat- which could be a possibility of course, if their bodies have become too used to not having food, there’s no need to keep them in the hospital.”

“So you want to send them to stay with my husband?” Brenda gasped. “You want to send them to somebody so deep in depression that he can’t even get out of bed some days?”

Mr Janson sighed again. “Consider it a trail for the Garcia Safe Home, we both know he still wants it. More than anything. Give him something to look forward to, and give these kids somewhere to go where we know they’ll get enough.”

Brenda growled slightly, but knew better than to argue too much with her supervisor.

xxxx

“We can keep them, Bren? They’re ours?” Jorge asked, staring down at the two sleeping children on the couch in the living room.

 “I wouldn’t say they’re ours.” Brenda tried to sound strict, but she couldn’t keep herself from feeling joy at the genuine happiness on her husband’s face. It’s something she’d deeply missed in the last half a year, since the Incident. “But better us than they’re actual parents, huh.”

Jorge nodded, looking completely overjoyed.

“You have to be better for them, Jorge.” Brenda said, warning more than apparent in her voice. “No more not getting out of bed, no more bullshit, okay? I still have to work, and these kids are YOUR responsibility now. I don’t think this is best idea ever, but you’re getting what you wanted.”

In response, Jorge turned away from the children and kissed her, for the first time in a very long time.

xxx

_Albert stood in front of the locked kitchen cabinets and sighed. He wasn’t sure what he had expected, that today would be the day they were unlocked, that just because Father hadn’t come home and served them dinner the night before that he would have some sort of right towards breakfast. He knew better by now._

_Albert was almost thirteen years old, and about half the weigh of any other boy his age. He liked the idea of sports, but was no where near strong to play any. He didn’t have friends, and passed through most days in a daze, nothing really sinking into his mind. The other thing that ever matter enough to register with him was Alexandria, how small she was- even in comparison to him. She never got enough and he knew it, wanted to help her. Sometimes he’d give her his share of food, but offend was just too hungry when the meal was placed in front of him that he wouldn’t even think about it until after all the food was gone. He walked over to her now, and knelt down beside his younger sister, placing his hand on her shoulder. Alexandria was cold- always cold. Having another child was the bad decision on his parents part, them only doing it to get more Baby Bonus from the government. Anything was better than actually having to work, right?_

_“Alby...” Alexandria mumbled suddenly, surprising her older brother. He’d had no idea that she was awake, she’d been so still for so long. “Are mommy and daddy bad people?”_

_Albert had to remind himself that Alexandria was only seven, that he needed to protect her as much as he possibly could. There was nothing he could do about her not getting enough food, that was out of his control, but he could settle her from the evil of the world. “Of course not, Alexandria. Mother and Father love us very much.” Albert was pretty sure that was a lie, but he didn’t know what else to tell her. She wasn’t old enough for truth, it would ruin her. “Why would you ask that?”_

_“Ms Taylor told us a story in class today. About these parents who were bad to their children, hit them and starveded them.” Alexandria told her brother, her childish way of speaking calming him. “She said they were bad people, and that it was good that their children were taken away at the end of the story.”_

_“Have Mother or Father ever hit you?” Albert asked, pretty sure he already knew the answer, but his stomach sinking all the same. If his little sister told him something he wasn’t expecting, Albert didn’t know what he would do. Loose him mind completely, probably. “_

_No. No, Alby.” Alexandria said, already starting to drift back into sleep. She had so little energy, it was hard for her to stay awake. “They just- they ignore me.”_

_Albert nodded, knowing exactly what she meant. Sometimes he wondered if he rather that they’d hit him- at least then he’d known that they had even the slightest idea that he existed. As long as they never hit Alexandria, everything would be okay. “Alby...” Alexandria sighed, almost sounding like she was speaking through half-sleep. “Ms Taylor told me she’s worried about me, she’s going to call somebody. I- Ima get in trouble by mommy and daddy.”_

_“I won’t let anything happen to you.” Albert promised her, stroking the small girl’s hair as she fell from consciousness again._

xxx

\When Albert woke up the next morning, he had no idea where he was. He panicked, remembering the terrifying memories of all the people in uniforms- police and something else- bursting into his house, arresting his parents, taking him and Alexandria-

Alexandria! Where was his sister? What had happened to Alexandria?

Albert was very close to hysterics when he heard something he hadn’t heard in a very long time, but would know instantly. Alexandria was laughing. Not the fake, nervous laugh she would give when Father was say something they both knew was expected to be taken as a joke, but actually laughing as though something was funny.

He jumped off the couch where he’d been laying and rushed into the nearby room. He found that it was a kitchen, with plenty of food being cooked on a stove that looked so new, so nice in comparison to what had been in the Edwards kitchen. Everything smelt so good, Albert felt like he might throw up just at the idea of all the food.

“Alby!” Alexandria called from the table. There was a large bowl of cereal- Albert didn’t know what it was, but it looked like it had small, colourful marshmallows in it- and a tall glass of orange juice in front of her. She was too small to reach the kitchen table on her own, and it appeared that she was sitting on top of several phone books. Albert blinked at her, and was surprised at how quickly the girl had gotten comfortable in this unknown location. She was smiling up at him, her feet kicking happily underneath the table. She spooned another amount of cereal into her mouth and smiled while little drips of milk fell from the corners of her lips.

Albert looked at her with a mixture of nervousness and suspicion. Alexandria smiled quickly and wiped the milk away with the back of her hand. “Don’t worry, Alby! Brendy and Jorge-y are nice!”

Albert blinked, shaking his head. He thought that after what had happened just the day before, Alexandria would never trust anybody ever again. Apparently, that wasn’t the case.

A tall woman walked over to him and Albert recognized her uniform to match some of those who had come into his house the day before. This put him only easily at ease, making him a different type of nervous now. He wanted to trust these people, wanted to let them in as easily as Alexandria had, but he knew he’d already cut himself off from people. He wasn’t going to let anybody hurt him or Alexandria ever again. “Take a seat, Albert.” She said, her voice gentle and full of concern.

Albert did what he said- he was always good at doing what he was told to- but keep glaring towards the woman, trying to express without words that he didn’t trust her. Alexandria reached over and patted his hand comfortingly. She smiled at him in reassurance, but it just made Albert notice that her mouth and eyes appeared to be much too large for her face and just how horrifying skinny she looked when she smiled.

“What would you like to eat, Albert?” The man standing by the stove called over his shoulder to him. He was frying up something Albert recognized as bacon, something his parents would eat the night the welfare cheques would come in, although they would never share with the children. His stomach growled loudly but he promised to stick to his resolve not to trust these people.

“Not hungry.” Albert lied bitterly. Accepting these people’s food was telling them that he wanted them in his life and that he was okay with being taken away from his parents and them most likely going to jail. In all honesty, he wasn’t entirely sure how he felt about the events that had gone down, but he did know that he was having some serious trouble trusting anybody that wasn’t his younger sister.

“Albert.” The woman sighed, looking almost put out, as though this wasn’t her idea of fun, either. He found a little bit of himself growing fond of this woman, she seemed to understand that this wasn’t a normal occurrence in anybody’s life. “If you don’t eat, we’ll be forced to take you to the hospital. I know you don’t want that.”

Albert sighed, but had to agree. Hospitals gave him the creep, he’d never like them. Not since Analeise had died.

“I dunno.” He mumbled. “Toast is fine.”

The woman and man exchanged worried glances but the man moved towards the bag of bread without any other word. The rest of the breakfast was silent aside from the sound of chewing and sipping. Albert felt a little uncomfortable, but also ate four more pieces of toast (and was still hungry). When the woman- Brenda- left for work, she seemed like the only other person in the house who was concerned about this situation.

 

** SIX MONTHS LATER **

It took a long time, but Albert and Alexandria began to put on weight. Alexandria was a surprisingly joyful little girl, considering all that she’d been through and Jorge became very attached to her. Brenda hadn’t seen him like this with anybody since Trina, and she really hoped that wasn’t some sort of messed up foreboding.

Albert was still sheltered, not letting anybody too far in. Whenever he’d get close to saying something personal, he’d realized where the conversation was going and completely shut down. It didn’t help that they were going through the trial, having to spend hours and hours in the same building as their parents without actually seeing them. Even Alexandria would be a little guarded and distant when they’d get home. Albert even refused to testify against his parents, while Alexandria was willing to talk about what happened even if she wasn’t exactly sure what it was that had happened.

“This case is in serious trouble if Albert won’t testify.” Jorge spoke up, looking at his wife from across the table. She looked at him, and raised her eyebrow. “I mean, right? Last time I checked that it’s pretty bad if the kid doesn’t say anything.”

“In this case, just the condition of the kids should be enough to keep them from getting them back anytime soon.” Brenda replied slowly, tapping her spoon against her cup of coffee. “They just might not have to do any jail time with a testify from Albert, thought they still might not even if he does.” Jorge nodded, sipping deeply without saying anything. He was just wanting for Albert to open up, let them in and start to recover.


	2. Minho

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, it’s Minho! Sorry this chapter is shorter than the last one, but I only had to introduce one character not four (or five if you count Janson, which I don’t really because he didn’t get back story) Also, huge thank you to anybody who read, kudos’d and commented on the last chapter I posted! Don’t worry, the Gladers will start appearing quickly

Brenda burst into the office in a whirl wind of anxiety and panic. The court date for the Edwards- the final court date- had just come to an end and while Brenda wasn’t entirely satisfied with the outcome, she was convinced that those dirt bags were never going to get those kids back.

Which pretty much meant that Jorge was probably going to adopt them (he’d actually starting looking at paperwork to do so) but she decided not to think about that. She had plenty of other things on her plate right now.

Which seemed to include Mr Janson sitting in her office with a very angry looking Asian boy. The boy was probably close in age to Albert, ten or eleven, but was much taller and had some muscle already on his young body.

“Minho Xiao Yong.” Mr Janson informed her before she even got the chance to ask.  “He’s going to be your next kid.”

“You mean my next case?” Brenda asked, already feeling slightly overwhelmed at how many cases had piled up on her desk since Ellen transferred departments.

“Nope.” Mr Janson smirked, crossing his arms and looking amused at her panic. “I mean, the next kid who’s going to join your little Safe Home.”

Brenda blinked in surprise. There was no way that Albert was ready for another person in the house, he’d barely gotten used to Brenda and Jorge. As Brenda opened her mouth to inform Mr Janson of this, he quickly cut across her.

“I know that it’s soon,” Mr Janson raised his hand to silence her. “But I think this is what’s best for Minho.”

“Yeah, but what about what’s best for Albert? He’s been through a lot- he went through a lot today alone!” Brenda really didn’t want to shake up the routine that they’d begun so soon. She’s thought they’d have longer, that Albert would have more time to get used to everything before they brought in a change.

“You’re going to put the happiness of one child over the happiness of another?” Mr Janson accused her, making Brenda’s heart sink in her chest.

“That’s exactly what you’re doing, Janson.”

“Yes, Garcia, but I- unlike you- never claimed to be a good person.” Mr Janson smiled, and pushed the child towards Brenda, who sighed and rolled her eyes. She knew that she wasn’t getting out of this one.

xxx

Brenda read over the case file while Minho sat beside her in the car, and it certainly was something else. She really could understand why Janson wanted Minho put into a Safe Home like the Edwards kids. It seemed the he had a relatively average childhood, both his parents worked at the Casino. Until his father began stealing money from the said Casino. To avoid getting caught, the family had gone on the run only recently being found, both parents dead and Minho sitting alone in a bloody hotel room. It was nothing short of terrifying, something out a Mobster movie.

It made her think- shortly- of Isaac Newton, but it was too painful. She knew her biggest regret in life was letting that kid slip through the cracks, and finding him would be on the top of priority list until it happened.

“So, Minho, you’re cool going to come stay with me now, alright?” She asked him, mostly just to make conversation. The angry Asian boy turned to glare at her.

“There’s not much of a fucking choice now, is it?” He scoffed, his harsh language surprising the woman, causing her to jump slightly but she managed to hold back her gasp. Brenda wasn’t even entirely sure why his language surprised her, she could already see that this was very angry little boy and his file had even informed her as much, but he was only twelve years old- a year younger than Albert- and Brenda was well aware that pre-teens used like much like that, she’d just always assumed that they hid from adults.

Although, it didn’t seem like Minho’s parents ever hid much from him, so he wouldn’t know much about secret keeping.

“Look, kid.” Brenda sighed. “I already have two I don’t really want in my house, giving my servely depressed husband false happiness. If you’re going to join us, I would greatly appreciate it if you at least tried to be civil about it.”

Minho titled his head to the side, as though he wasn’t exactly sure what to make of this woman. Then a small smile spread across his face. “You’re not going to bullshit or sugar coat things for me, are you?” It wasn’t really a question, but Brenda decided to answer none the less.

“You don’t exactly seem like the type of kid to put up with that.” She said simply. “Plus doesn’t seem like you’ve had very much sugar coated before, I see no reason to start now.”

Minho smiled at her- a real, genuine smile- and nodded his approval. “I think we’re going to get along real well.”

Brenda nodded at the boy, wondering why she already felt such a strong connection to him. Almost like she wanted to do right by him.

xxx

Minho got into the routine much faster than Albert, who was thrown through a complete loop when another child came to live with them- just as Brenda had told Janson that he would.

Jorge didn’t seem to be nearly as attached to Minho as he was Albert and Alexandria. He liked the kid just fine, but when it came down to it- Minho was Brendas’ kid while Albert and Alexandria were Jorges’. On most days, Albert wouldn’t even look at Minho and rarely spoke to Brenda. It seemed as though the only people he tolerated were Jorge and his biological sister. He didn’t see anybody else as family. Even weirder though was that when Albert would talk about Minho, he would refer to him as “the Baby Bonus” which greatly confused Brenda and irritated Minho to no end.

She’d told him not to pick a fight with the older- yet significantly smaller- boy. “It’ll only make things worse for everybody living here.”

Another very large difference between Minho and the Edwards was that while Albert and Alexandria had next to nothing when they came to live with Brenda and Jorge, Minho had entirely too much stuff. They didn’t have enough room for even HALF of it and Minho was forced to put most of it into storage.

This caused quite the uproar from the small Asian child. He didn’t want to put anyway any of his things- they all apparently had very strong sentimental value. Brenda conscientiously reminded herself that while she knew just how horrible the Xiao Yongs had been, that Minho was still too young to truly understand what they had been doing and missed his parents dearly. She was still waiting for the inevitable break down, when Minho begins to process what exactly had happened that day in the hotel room. What he had seen.

Until then, she was happy to accept the oddly cheerful though slightly socially backwards boy that seemed to have no problem playing video games with an eight year old girl for hours on end. Minho and Alexandria really were starting to become quite the buds, much to the discomfort of Albert.

“Come on, Alexandria.” Albert called over to her from the kitchen table. “Help me set the table for dinner, then I’ll play with you!”

“No!” Alexandria called to him, not even looking over her shoulder towards her brother. “I wanna play with brother Minho!”

She didn’t see the look of pure hurt on her brothers face as she ran off to find the other boy.

xxx

_“Get in here boy!”_

_Minho jumped up and ran towards the living room without hesistation. If it had been any other person in the world, Minho probably would have told them to suck one and that he’d come in when he was good and ready... But Mr Xiao Yong was not somebody to be messed with, even nine year old Minho knew that._

_His father scared him sometimes, though he’d never admit that to anyone. Though, he didn’t really have anybody to admit that, too, aside from his mother- who was nearly as scary as his father._

_Minho had expected for a long time that there was something not quite right with his parents, knew that they weren’t like other parents that kids his age had. They moved often, too often, and people regularly came to dinner and were never seen again. The Xiao Yongs would go out for weeks a time, only to return slightly frantic and declare that they were moving- again._

_“Minho, my dear son.” Mr Xiao Yong called out as the boy entered the room. Minho glanced around quickly, taking in the surprising scene in front of him. A man, Minho only recognized his vaguely, was sitting on his knees before his father, mouth gagged and nose dripping blood. It appeared as though his face was already bruises and there were tears rolling down his face._

_Minho’s stomach dropped and he wanted to run, run far away but he was too scared. So he simply stood there, dumbfounded, staring at his father._

_“I think it’s about time you learned all about the family business.” He told his son as he pulled the gun from his pocket. Minho moved backwards subconciously, only a small step, but it was enough for his mother to notice._

_“Do not be afraid, Minho.” She told him, her accent strong and slightly comforting. “You will be not be harmed as long as I am around.”_

_Mr Xiao Yong nodded and pressed the gun to the head of the man in front of him and smiled the most sinister and terrifying smiled Minho had seen in his life. Again, he felt the need to flee._

_“Before I explain anything to you, son, you should know what we do to traitors around here.”_

_The man began to frantically shake his head, the tears pouring from his eyes at a steady pace now. Then Mr Xiao Yong pulled the trigger. Blood blew everything, covering Minho. The boy turned away from the scene in horror, feeling his lunch flying up from his stomach and escaping his mouth._

xxx

“Gang activity, drug dealing.” Jorge shook his head, reading over the Xiao Yong file for the hundredth time. “This kid’s been through the ringer. We better expect some serious problems with him.”

Brenda glanced over her shoulder at the Asian boy, playing happily with Alexandria and seeming at ease. “Maybe.” She said.

Jorge looked up, brow crinkling in confusion. “What?”

“I said maybe. Yes, we sure be prepared for him to cause problems.” Brenda shrugged, taking a deep sip from her drink. “But he might surprise us yet. With a past like his, we might just want to expect the unexpected.”

 


	3. Gally

Half a year after Minho Xiao Yong came to live with them and the little make-shift family had really gotten itself into a good routine. The children had started school, Albert only doing half days seeing as he needed to be more carefully transitioned into social situations- he still had fairly strong trust issues. Albert and Minho had started to get on a little bit better, while they were no where near being best friends it seemed as though they were capable of leaving under the same roof together for a long period of time. Albert seemed to accept that Alexandria could love them both, though Brenda still noticed him getting jealous at times.

 

Minho had made good friends in Ben and Frypan (Brenda wasn’t entirely sure what his actually name was, but she was hopeful that it wasn’t actually Frypan) and the three boys were more than happy to include Alby in their little group whenever the darker skinned boy was feeling in the mood to play. Hang out, whatever the kids were calling it at their age.

 

Alexandria had made friends, too. In fact, she was one of the most popular children in her second grade class, though Brenda mostly only saw Harriet running around the house with the lone girl.

 

The morning that Brenda was called very unexpectedly into work, Minho, Ben and Alby were all sitting on the couch, playing some sort of loud, violent video game. She wasn’t entirely sure how she felt about them playing such a game, but realized that them all being around the age of thirteen that telling them that they couldn’t play it would only make the boys want to more.

 

“I’m heading out!” She called over her shoulder to her not-so-little family, grabbing her keys from the bowl beside the door. “If Frypan comes over later, tell him he’s not allowed to use my stove!”

 

There was a chorus of laughter that followed her out, leaving a small smile on her face. Though she wouldn’t admit it to anyone aside from Jorge, she really was starting to love her little family.

 

Janson was waiting for her in her office again, and Brenda sighed internally at the sight of the all the paper work he had in his hands. It could only mean one thing..

 xxx

“Got another kiddo for you!” Janson called, sounding almost cheerful. Brenda wondered once again why he would get into a job that required working with children nearly all of the time. “This one’s a doozie!”

 

It certainly was, and there wasn’t much to go on either. Boy found outside a burning apartment building, covered in soot and seemingly unharmed. He hadn’t told anybody anything about what had happened- in fact, he hadn’t spoken at all since the police had picked him up. The house had the bodies of three people, two adults and one child around the age of seven. They were assuming the bodies belonged to the family of the boy but they had were still running tests.

 

“They think the boy started the fire?” Brenda asked, leaning back in her chair as she flipped through the case file.

 

Janson nodded. “Can’t get a word out of him, though. Appears to have gone mute so they’re looking for enough evidence to prove something.”

 

Brenda sighed and looked up from the file. “You think the parents were abusing him?”

 

“He doesn’t seem to have any injuries, though that doesn’t mean much- just that they weren’t hitting him.” Janson shrugged, taking the case file back. “I just don’t see why he’d leave his sibling in the building while he burned his parents. You’d think he’d want to save his sibling from the abuse, too?”

 

“It doesn’t make much sense, I’ll give you that.” Brenda agreed “but maybe there just wasn’t time to get to them.”

 

“If he did burn the house down, I doubt it was something he did as a spur of the moment idea. He most likely planned what he was going to do.” Janson pointed out. “There should have been time to take the other child out.”

 

“Maybe it was an accident.” Brenda suggested, her eyebrow crinkling.

 

“Or maybe the kid had nothing to do with it at all and the police are barking up the wrong tree.” Janson groaned. “But it’s not up to us to decide that. Our job is find this kid somewhere to stay that isn’t a holding cell.”

 

Brenda stared blankly at him.

 

“We both know that a regular temporary foster home won’t work for this kid. Not if he won’t talk. Not to mention nobody would want a possibly pyromaniac in their homes.”

 

“So why do you think I do?” Brenda asked him, feeling exasperated. Janson took her completely for granted.

 

“I don’t think that you believe that the kid did it.”

 xxx

_Gally saw the car coming straight for theirs and covered his eyes with his hands, before reconsidering and shielding his younger brother’s body with his own._

_His father swerved at the last second, barely saving the lives of his entire family._

_“I TOLD YOU.” Gally’s mother sheriked, her voice like nails on a chalkboard. “I TOLD YOU THAT YOU WERE TOO FUCKING DRUNK TO DRIVE. YOU ARE ACTUALLY FUCKING USELESS, YOU’RE A FUCKING USELESS PIECE OF SHIT. NO FUCKING WONDER YOUR FAMILY DISOWNED ME FOR MARRYING YOU. BIGGEST REGRET OF MY LIFE. YOU COULD HAVE KILLED US, FOR GODS SAKE.”_

_Gally noticed the way his father’s knuckles turn white from his tight grip on the steering wheel and knew that his father had some vodka right now. Life hadn’t always been like this, but lately it was all Gally knew._

_His father lost his job a year or so back, and now his mother had to support the family of four- and wasn’t happy about it at all. Her constant complaining and nagging had lead Gally’s father towards drink and turned the house into a place too toxic for children. His father never came near them or even touched a hair on their heads- he was more of a weepy drunk, crying a lot, but their mother had turned into a large ball of rage._

_She had once been like a thunder storm, an occasion rumble in the distance but that had changed. She was now the most active of volcanoes, always on the brink of erupting._

_“It’s okay, Mommy.” Gally’s brother, Greg, spoke up nervously and Gally fought the urge to smack his forehead and sigh. He knew by now to keep quiet when their mother was like this, but Greg was still little- only six years old- and didn’t really get it yet. He didn’t know why Mommy yelled all the time, when Daddy slurred all this words. He didn’t know why his life had changed so much so suddenly._

_“SHUT UP.” Both their parents roared, the car swerving a little bit on the road again. Gally buried his face back behind his hands, not wanting to see what on coming traffic they might run into._

 

Gally sat in Brenda’s car, watching her drive on the right side of the road with ease. This was a woman that would clearly never drink and drive, probably would never even consider it.

 

Gally was still wearing the ash-covered clothes the police had picked him up in, much to Brenda’s rage. Oh, she’d definitely ripped those boys down at the station a new asshole when she’d seen the state of the boy.

 

“Whether or not you believe he set that fire, that gives you no right to treat a child in such a horrific fashion!” She’d shouted, Gally had been able to hear from the room where he’d been left- again. “You don’t know any of his story or what he’s been through!”

 

They now sat in the car, completely silent, almost to the point of awkwardness. Brenda kept glancing over to the boy, almost expecting him to say something, start freaking out, anything.

 

But Gally wouldn’t. He wasn’t going to talk anymore.

xxx

 There was nothing left for him to say to anybody.

 

“Alby! Come back here!” Alexandria was screaming as Gally and Brenda entered the house. It appeared as though Jorge had given the children permission to have their friends over for supper. Now, normally, that would be no problem but she wasn’t entirely sure how Gally would react to this house full. Not to mention that she didn’t know if he was dangerous or not.

 

Brenda had called ahead of time and had Jorge get clothes from Minho’s closet that Gally could change into. While Minho was certainly more muscluar than the boy, Gally was taller so Brenda was hopeful that the sizes would even themselves out to something a little more reasonable than Gally attempted to share clothing with Albert, who despite being older seemed to be- for very logical reasons- much smaller than the other two boys.

 

The clothes were sitting on the table in the entrance way and Brenda handed them to Gally and directed him towards the bathroom. The blond boy nodded his understanding but still did not speak. It would be worrisome if it wasn’t so annoying.

 

“Alby!” Alexandria shrieked again, running after her brother. The two children nearly set Brenda tumbling down the stairs as they ran past her, Albert holding onto some sort of Barbie doll. “Give me back Princess Lexie!”

 

“How self centered is it to name your Barbie doll after yourself?” Minho asked, clearly directly his comments towards Brenda. Brenda agreed but knew better than to encourage Minho’s self righteous behaviours and attitudes.

 

“She’s eight years old.” Was the only reply Brenda would give before headed towards her room.

 

Set up on the dresser was the Newton case. It was open to the same page it always was, her right up on what she’d seen that day when she’d visited their home. The mother, Cristina Newton, had grown up just down the street from Brenda and they had even spend time together when they were young. She never would have expected the sweet, caring little girl from her childhood was capable of the things she’d seen in the house that day.

 

Brenda sighed and closed the case file, not wanting to be reminded of the small boy that she had failed.

xxx

  _“No, please!” The boy cried, holding onto her legs. Brenda struggled to move away, to fight back the tears that threatened to spill over at any given moment. She knew they were coming, she just wanted to be back in her truck when it happened. “Take me with you! Don’t leave me here! They’ll kill me!”_

_Brenda had seen the house, she believe everything the small blond child was saying to her. Isaac Netwon was the closest thing she’d ever see to an actual angel, with these huge brown eyes and the expression of a puppy just waiting to be kicked. The bruises littered his body, from head to toe. She was pissed that it had taken his teacher so long to call in, if only he’d called earlier she could already have the boy out of here and somewhere safe._

_“I’ll come back for you, Isaac, I promise.” Brenda assured, biting back at sob at the desperate expression on his face. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”_

_It was a promise that Brenda knew that she shouldn’t be making, that even getting the boy out of this house wouldn’t grantee that nothing bad would happen to him. But looking at the ivory pale face that was more blue than white and the multiple wounds on his arms that looked like a mixture of burns and cuts, Brenda swore she would adopt this child herself if it might that he had even the slightest chance at being happy._

_She had know idea that when she went back for him, the entire family would have vanished without a trace._

__


	4. Teresa

“Do not call her DeeDee.” Janson warned Brenda as they moved towards the back of the police station. “She hates it.”

 “But that’s her name?” Brenda asked, flipping through the case file and wincing at what she was reading.

 “She prefers to go by her sister’s name. Teresa.” Janson replied simply, but with one look at this girl- Teresa’s- story, Brenda could see why remembering her sister would be so important.

 The woman stood and walked towards the back room, taking a short glance in. Teresa was seated on the bench, holding tightly onto a teddy bear. Brenda recognized it as the bears that the paramedics gave to children when they are picked up. Judging by her case file, this teddy bear might be all Teresa had to her name.

 In fact, her story wasn’t all that different from Brenda’s.

_x_

_Brenda was six years old, sitting on her bedroom floor. She looked up at her sister, Jessica, as the older girl stared at the window._

_There was a rather large age difference between Brenda and her sister, who would be graduating high school in only a few months. Brenda looked up to her sister and admired her none the less. She wanted to be just like her big sister._

_“What’s the matter Jessy? You okay?” Brenda called over to her, distracting the girl from staring. She glanced over at her sister and smiled slightly- though it seemed much too forced, even the six year old could tell._

_“Everything’s fine, Bren. Don’t worry about me.”_

_Jessica went back to staring out the window thoughtfully._

_x_

Teresa sat alone once Brenda brought her home, not so much as looking at the other kids in the house. Minho, on the other hand, seemed to show a great fascination in the dark haired girl, contentiously glancing over at her while they were playing.

 “Why won’t that girl come play with us?” Minho asked Brenda once he finally took a break, taking a juice box from the fridge.

 “She’s gone through a lot lately. You’ve just got to give her time.” Brenda nodded, patting Minho on the back. The Asian boy looked over at her again, an odd smile on his face.

 “We’ve all been through a lot.” He said without feeling and simple shrug of the shoulders. “That’s why we need each it. Even Gally realized that.”

 Brenda watched the boy head back into the living room, wondering how he could speak like such an adult, yet still act like such a child. Teresa entered the room and tugged on Brenda’s blazer sleeve. Once Brenda looked down at her, Teresa tugged again and pointed towards the fridge.

 “I’m sorry, I don’t know what you want, sweetie.” Brenda said, knowing that her voice sounded patronizing. Teresa looked genuinely annoyed and even stamped her foot. She glared at Brenda and pointed towards the fridge again.

 “She’s hungry.” Alexandria’s voice came from the door way that separated the kitchen from the living room. She was leaning up against the wall, drinking the juice box she’d undoubtedly stolen from Minho the second she’d seen it. “We should have snack time now.”

 Brenda looked down at the girl, and smiled as nicely as she could. “Are you hungry, Teresa?”

 Teresa didn’t show any sign of a reply but simply glanced back over towards Alexandria. She stepped forward and took the other girls hand in her own, pulling her away from the kitchen. Brenda sighed loudly and ran her fingers through her hair. She really hoped that Teresa would talk soon, having one mute child in the house was hard enough.

x 

_Teresa was standing in the window, looking down at the ground. She hadn’t been expecting her younger sister to walk into the room._

_"What are you doing, Tesa?” DeeDee asked, holding her hands together tightly. Her hair was tied tightly into two ponytails and her dress was perfectly ironed. “Tesa? Teresa, talk to me!”_

_Teresa shook her head, this wasn’t right, this wasn’t how it supposed to happen. But she couldn’t do this anymore, couldn’t handle it._

_“DeeDee.. I’m sorry.” Teresa shook her head, the tears pouring down her face at an alarming rate. “I’m so, so sorry.”_

_Then she leaned backwards out the window and fell._

_“No!”_

_x_

“No! No! No!” Teresa started screaming, sitting forward in the bed that Brenda and Jorge had found for her to sleep in. She instantly awoke Alexandria, who nearly fell out of bed at the sound.

 “Teresa? Are you okay?” Alexandria slide away from her bed and crawling over to her. “What happened?”

 Teresa clamped her hands over her eyes and began rocking back and forth. “No! No! No!”

 The bedroom door opened and Brenda launched herself into the room, Minho and Albert right on her tail. Brenda sat herself down on the bed and rubbed Teresa’s back as the small girl began to sob, still repeating “No!”.

 Minho sat down across from Teresa and looked at her in concern. “Teresa, it’s okay. You’re safe here.” Minho took hold of one of Teresa’s hands and pulled it away from her face. She looked at him, eyes still littering with tears and panic raging all over her face. “It’s okay. Whatever bad thing happened to you, Brenda and Jorge won’t let anybody hurt you. They’ll make sure everything is okay, that you’re okay.”

 Brenda wrapped an arm around Minho’s shoulder and pulled him closer to her. Teresa stared at them, eyes watering still but looking significantly more calm.

 “My name was DeeDee in my old home.” She said, her voice still shaking and deeper than Brenda would expect it to be. “My sister’s name was Teresa, but she died... She killed herself. I saw her do it.” Teresa let out another small sob, and shook her head again. “My mommy was very sick after that. Then they took me away.”

 Minho moved closer to the girl and placed his hands around his wrists. “You’ll be okay. You’re safe here.”

 Teresa lunged forward and wrapped her arms around Minho, crying into his shoulders. Brenda watched in surprise. While Minho may have opened up to the other kids, he wasn’t too fond of anybody who wasn’t Brenda touching him. But here he was, letting a girl he’d known for only a couple of hours hug him.

 She didn’t think she’d ever been more proud of the development these kids were making.


	5. Thomas

The boy stood in the entrance to the Childrens’ AID, with a back pack in his hands. His hair was dark brown and spiked upwards, dark circles underneath his eyes. His shirt was ripped and ragged, a dark red plaid. The holes of his jeans had holes in them and his sneakers were nearly falling off his feet.

 

Brenda stopped on her way to the office and crouched down in front of him. She looked into his eyes and saw a mix of fear and desperation.

 

“Can I help you, honey?” She asked, reaching out to hold onto his arm. “Everything okay?”

 

“I was...I was just wondering if you had a- a bathroom. I really gots to go.”

 

The boy looked about nine years old, and skinny as skeleton. The paleness of his skin reminded Brenda temporarily of Isaac Newton, but she winced and turned away. It was too much, everything reminded her of Isaac Newton these days, and she was starting to lose her mind. She knew she had to find that boy, and soon.

 

But now she had somebody to preoccupy herself with at work, and more than enough things to preoccupy her at home.

 

She looked at the boy, truly taking in just how shabby he looked. “We certainly do have a bathroom, kiddo. Where are your parents?”

 

The boy just shrugged. Brenda escorted him towards the bathroom and then notified Mr Janson.

 xxx

“I don’t know anything, other than his clothes seem to be falling apart, his pale and clearly malnourished. And he needed to use the bathroom.” She said as she led Jorge back into her office, where the boy was now sitting in the desk chair. He looked up at them as they walked in, his expression scarily calm.

 

Brenda kneeled before him and smiled. “What’s your name?”

 

“Thomas.” He said, his voice cracking slightly. Tears filled up his eyes and he began fidgeting in his chair. “Mommy said I’m named after my grandfather, that he was the greatest man ever.”

 

“I bet he was.” Brenda nodded. “What else can you tell me about your Mommy?”

 

“She said that I’m not ‘sposed to ask people to use the bathroom.” Thomas replied carefully. “That it’s rude. She promised to get it fixed, so long as I don’t tell nobody. I’m sorry to be rude, but I really had to go. I couldn’t hold it anymore.”

 

Brenda nodded again, fear settling itself in the pit of her stomach. “When was the last time your bathroom was working?”

 

Thomas paused, crinkling up his nose in thought. “Before my sister was born.” He said finally, tears filling up his eyes again. Brenda made a mental note to find this family, to find this boys’ sister.

 

“How old is your sister, Thomas?” She asked him, refusing to look away from the boy, despite feeling Mr Janson’s eyes on her back.

 

A single tear fell from Thomas’ eye. “My sister died last year. She was two.”

 

Brenda felt piece of her heart snap slightly, and she fought back the tears that threatened to fill her eyes. She blamed Jorge’s stupid little pet project, she never really got attached to this experiences as much as she did now. Things were just too painful.

 

“Okay, Thomas, I’m going to go talk to Mr Janson here for a second, okay?” Brenda stood slowly. “I’ll be right back, don’t move, okay?”

 

Thomas nodded slowly, tears still shining in his eyes.

 

 

“Don’t do it, Brenda.” Were the first words that left Mr Jansons’ mouth.

 

“Do what?” Brenda asked, knowing full well that her irritation was shining through. She was, frankly, tired of Mr Janson acting as though he knew her.

 

“The last time I saw you so passionate about a kid this quickly was the Newton boy.”

 

Okay, maybe he knew her a little.

 

“If you think I’m letting this distract me from finding Isaac Newton, don’t worry.” Brenda brushed him off, crossing her arms in anger.

 

“If I thought this would distract you from the Newton case, I’d let you bring the kid home right now.” Mr Janson jumped in, anger apparent on his face. Brenda stared at him in surprise, not having known that Mr Janson had any opinion on the Newton case- let alone one of such strength. “You’ve given up too much time to this, if you’re not careful this could ruin you. You could end up just like your husband.”

 

Brenda winced at the thought of what happened with Jorge- the “incident”- being even slightly related to Isaac Newton. She wouldn’t allow that to happen, never.

 

“I’m not giving up on Isaac Newton. Don’t even bother asking.” Brenda practically growled.

 

“I’m not asking you to give up, but I am telling you to slow down.” Mr Janson spoke calmly, his voice as detached from emotion as it usually was. “You’re running yourself too thin with this.”

 

“The slower I move, the less chance we have of finding him alive.” Brenda felt the panic beginning to pool in her chest. She might not have experienced this for many years, but Brenda knew she would always recognize the feelings of a panic attack.

 

“I hate to say this…”

 

“Then don’t. Just don’t.”

 

Brenda turned away, ready to head back into the office, to start talking about Thomas’ options but Mr Janson grabbed hold of her arm. “Brenda, you know the family saw the signs. They knew both us and the police were closing in on them. Even if they didn’t get rid of the boy because he was dead weight, it’s very unlikely he could have survived those living conditions for this long.”

 

Brenda faced him, her eyes filled with anger and cheeks flushed. “I am not giving up on Isaac Newton. I will find him, no matter what it is I’m finding.”

 

“I’m not telling you to give up. I’m telling you to slow down.”

 

Brenda shook her head, biting back her retort. She inhaled deeply, counted to ten in her head before asking another question. “What are we going to do with Thomas?”

 

“You’re clearly committed to this boy, and I’d send him home with you if I could but we both know that’s not how it works.” Mr Janson sighed with a slight eye roll. “So I’ll get some paper work started to figure out where he came from and what his life is like. We’ll figure something out.”

 

“You want me to start getting everything at home ready for him?” Brenda asked, nail digging in her own arms as she continued to fight back the urge to punch the man in front of her.

 

Mr Janson glanced through the window into Brendas’ office at the small boy seated on the chair.

 

“It would be a good idea, yes.”

 

xxx 

_Thomas sat on the floor, starting at the pot in front of him. The whole house smelt, but most of the time the eight year old boy didn’t even notice. He’d become so used to it. However, when it came time to actually use the bathroom, it was overwhelming._

_“Mommy, I don’t like this.” Thomas whined, his eyes stinging from the scent. His mother was once a beautiful woman with potential to be something great. She often told Thomas about her childhood, about her piano lessons and private schools, about how boys used to trip over themselves to date her. She’d tell him about his father, about how she’d given up her life of fortune to be with him, how she’d been left with next to nothing after he’d died. Thomas though his mother must be the strongest woman in the world._

_“I know it’s not great, sweetheart, but we’re just going to have the hold on for a little bit longer.” She told him, reaching out to stroke his hair. Ever since his little sister, Clarke, had died there had be a certain level of darkness in his mother that scared Thomas, but he knew she was still the same person. She still loved him, would do anything to help him._

_“Is Aunt Marie going to come over again? She fixed it last time.” Thomas asked, still avoiding peeing in the small pot. He thought it might overflow and Thomas didn’t want to trouble his mother with that mess. She was so sad lately, the last thing he wanted to do was make it worse. He loved his mother, she was all he had in the world._

_“It’s been a very long time since I’ve spoken to your Aunt Marie, Thomas.” Was the only reply his mother gave him before getting up and leaving Thomas alone on the kitchen floor._

_xxx_

Thomas came to stay with them two weeks later, after a very quick inspection of his home. They were now attempt to find some sort of relative to help Thomas and his mother, but at the most there wasn’t anything coming up.

 

“Make yourself at home, Thomas.” Jorge greeted the young boy with juice boxes and smiles. Brenda noted that he’d become a right house-wife in the past year or so.

 

Minho bounced up to Thomas, and smirked at him. “Hey, shank!”

 

Brenda rolled her eyes. She’d told Minho that as long as he was a member of her household, he was not allowed to swear. The boy had managed to get around the rules by inventing his own slang to replace the curse words that had once been a very large part of his vocabulary.

 

Thomas tilted his head slightly, biting down on his lip. “What- What’s a shank?”

 

Minho smiled. “I can’t tell you. Brendy would be mad at me for using words like them!”

 

Thomas smiled tentatively and nodded as though that made perfect sense. “My mommy doesn’t like me swearing either. I don’t do it much though.”

 

Minho shrugged. “Brendy isn’t my mom, she’s way cooler than a mom. You’re going to like it here, Thomas. Mostly because I’m here, of course.”

 

Brenda watched fondly as Minho lead Thomas back towards the other kids. Every day she thanked whatever Gods were out there for Minho Xiao Yong.

xxx 

Brenda received the phone call that night. Her co-worker, Rachel, wasn’t somebody who normally called, so Brenda knew instantly something was wrong.

 

“What is it?” She asked, not so-much as a hello beforehand. There was really only one reason that Rachel would be calling her outside of work hours.

 

Sure enough…

 

“They found the Newton boy.”

 

Brenda’s felt her stomach drop down to the floor. She refused to give herself even a second of hope. _Always expect the worst,_ she told herself.

 

“How- how bad is it?” She asked, every fibre of her body dreading the answer.

 

“Bad.” Rachel confirmed, sounding equally upset. “But it could have been worse. It could have been so much worse.”

 

“Where is he?”

 

“Flare Memorial Hospital.”

 

“I’m coming.”

 

Brenda practically flew from the house, not pausing to give anybody a second glance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Newt is the next chapter and he's the last one I'm introducing while they're all kids. Soo, do you want many another chapter where they're still kids or do you want me to skip to them all being teens?
> 
> Because once they're teens we'll have Newtmas starting


	6. Newt

Brenda kept expecting somebody to yell at her for running as she rushed through the hospital halls. She finally found the room- 317- and burst in without even the consideration of knocking. What she saw once she got in… Brenda knew it would haunt her dreams for many years to come.

 

Isaac Newton was worse than the last time they met. Much worse.

 

His skin was practically translucent, it was pulled so tightly over his body. Every bone and joint stuck out on him, and the dark circles under his eyes were much closer to black than purple now. His breathing was shallow, and it seemed like merely opening his eyes took too much strength from the small boy. His ankle was wrapping in a cast and hanging from the edge of the bed.

 

Brenda’s heart was beating so fast and loud that she couldn’t hear anything over it. She looked over at Rachel, would was seated in the bedside chair, looking equally concerned.

 

“What happened to his ankle?” She asked, stepping closer to the sleeping boy.

 

“Parents attempted to run him over with the car.” She replied, voice breaking. “It seems they were in a hurry to get away from us, and Isaac here didn’t get into the car quickly enough.”

 

Brenda brushed her hand across her mouth and felt her knees shake. “Will he recover?”

 

Rachel shrugged slightly. “The doctors say he should be okay from the physical injuries. Might have a limp for the rest of life, though.”

 

Tears filled Brenda’s eyes and she took the seat beside Rachel and looked down at the sleeping child. Somehow he was still the most angelic child she’d ever seen.

 

“He’ll make it.” Rachel said then, her voice full of the confidence that Brenda couldn’t seem to find. “This kid’s a fighter, I can feel it.”

 

Brenda nodded but said nothing. She was beyond hope for anything now. She’d just have to wait and see how things played out.

 

xxx

 

“Brenda have you gone home at all over the past two weeks?” Mr Janson asked her, appearing in a whirlwind of business as usual. Brenda looked up at him and sighed.

 

“They took off the IV today since he can now stomach soup.” Brenda sighed, leaning back against the chair. “Apparently that’s progress.”

 

“It _is_ progress, Garcia.” Mr Janson sighed, taking the seat beside her. “But really, all the paperwork as gone through. Isaac will be going home with you once he’s released from the hospital. There’s no need to spend all this time here.”

 

“What if he needs me?” She asked, tears filling her eyes again. Brenda cursed herself. She’d never been an emotional person before this. A large part of her still blamed Jorge and his silly idea.

 

“And what about those five children you have at home?” Mr Janson leaned closer to Brenda, so close that she could smell the Taco Bell he’d clearly had for lunch. “Don’t you think they’re going to need you?”

 

Brenda paused, her mind instantly going towards Minho. He’d never ask Jorge for help if he needed it, he was Brenda’s through and through. Thinking of Minho led her to think of Thomas, of the little boy she’d brought home two weeks ago and never gotten the chance to know. Of Gally, who hadn’t let anybody in and still wouldn’t speak. What if he spoke while she gone? Could she forgive herself for missing that progress?

 

“You call me the second anything happens.” Brenda demanded, quickly gathering up her things. “And I mean anything.”

 

Janson nodded, a small smile of victory stretching across his face.

 

xxx

 

Thomas crawled over to Brenda and sat down beside her. She smiled down at him. The little boy was so child-like, it was sometimes easy to forget that he was actually ten years old, not five.

 

“Tell me about Eyesack again.” Thomas asked, playing with his socks. Brenda smiled slightly. When she’d gotten home from the hospital earlier that day, she’d explained that they’d be getting a new member of their family soon.

 

Minho had been mildly amused for a moment before turning back to his video games. Teresa and Alexandria didn’t even try to pretend they cared, simply rushing back outside to meet up with Harriet. Gally hadn’t said anything, as per usual and Alby had asked a few vague questions before wandering away.

 

Thomas had been a complete different story, seeming genuinely interested in the Newton boy. Horrified by the events that had happened to him, and excited to meet him.

 

“What do you want to know, sweetheart?” She asked, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. “I think I’ve told you everything, more than once.”

 

“How old is he?” Thomas asked, his eyes shining up at her. She smiled again.

 

“He just turned nine a few weeks ago.” She told him, stroking his back mindlessly. “So he’s not much younger than you, and older than Alexandria.”

 

Thomas nodded again. “When is he coming?”

 

Brenda sighed, the smile still on her face. “I’m not entirely sure, Thomas. When he gets better.”

 

Thomas leaned up against her, and looked at numbly towards the television. “I want to meet him.”

 

Brenda was quiet for a second, wondering why Thomas was so interested in the boy. “How about I let you come with me to the hospital when we go to bring him home? Would you like that?”

 

Thomas was so excited he began to bounce on the spot.

 

xxx

 

It was a whole month after Brenda and Thomas’ conversation that the Newton boy finally came home. The two helped him out to the car in the wheel chair and Thomas held onto his crutches while Brenda got him into the car.

 

“Thanks.” The boy said quietly when Thomas handed him the crutches and climbed in beside him.

 

“I’m Thomas.” He told him, enthusiasm apparent on his face. The Newton boy smiled at him.

 

“Hi, Thomas…” He hesitated for a moment, before meeting Thomas’ eye. “Can I call you Tommy? It’s just... well, it’s easier than Thomas.”

 

Brenda knew that Minho sometimes called Thomas ‘Tommy’ and that the boy hated it, and she fully expected Thomas to say no right away. She definitely didn’t expect the boy’s face to brighten and break into a huge smile.

 

“Yeah! Course!” Thomas bounced a little in his seat. “You’re name is Isaac, right?”

 

The boy winced. “I don’t like being called Isaac, it’s my dads’ name. People can…” He hesitated, glancing towards Brenda in the window. “People can call me Newt. Like the lizard. I like lizards.”

 

Brenda smiled again. This was going to be an interesting home to live in.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, it's Newt!! :)


	7. Chapter 7

Brenda watched the children play under the spray of sprinkler, trying to pretend that she hadn’t grown fond of them over the past year or so.

 

They’d all made so much progress since she’d brought them to stay with her, even Gally. The mute boy’s case was still in the works and Brenda was still unsure what the outcome would be, but Janson was right… she didn’t think the boy killed his family. Watching him co-exist with all the others in her home, she just didn’t think he had it in him.

 

Albert was still protective over Alexandria, but even he was starting to lean up a bit. Starting to get comfortable here. Unless Brenda was mistaken, she’d hear him refer to Minho as his brother just a few days before.

 

Minho was always interesting, and she still found him amusing. Jorge struggled with the Asian boy, not sure exactly how to handle him and his humour but he got on remarkably well with Brenda and seemed to think Thomas was the bees’ knees. (Not that Minho would ever use to the term “the bees’ knees).

 

Frankly, Brenda thought Thomas was the bee’s knees, too. He was genuinely smart and caring kid with a smile that could light up the whole room. He still didn’t think of this as his home or these people as his family but she couldn’t blame him. Unlike the others, Thomas didn’t come from a home full of hatred. He just had a family that had been dealt all the wrong cards and missed his mother dearly.

 

Teresa was still a little cold, but was warming up slowly. Surprisingly, Minho seemed to be her closest companion aside from Alexandria. There seemed to be something with the two of them, some sort of bond that pulled them closer together. Something that made them similar.

 

As for Newt? Well, everybody loved Newt but nobody seemed to care for him as much as Thomas did. Sometimes Brenda wondered if Thomas loved Newt more than even she did. You rarely saw one without the other, and Thomas was the only person who could get Newt to open up. To smile, to be happy. Thomas was the one who watched Newt while the blond child ran, making sure that he wasn’t hurting his leg. Thomas was the one who would try to catch him if he did, but usually only ended up with both of them on the ground, laughing, while Minho mocked them both and Albert reprimanded him for it.

 

The little make shift family was better off than Brenda would ever have expected it to be.

 

“Tommy, wait up!”

xxx

 

Minho would sometimes stop in the middle of whatever he was doing and just watch Newt and Thomas interact. Things they did sometimes reminded him of his parents, but in a non-scary way.

 

The way Thomas would brush hands with Newt while they were walking, or the way Newt’s face flush every time. The way they would instantly come to the others defense, not letting any argument go unsolved. How sometimes, just sometimes, Minho thought he saw them holding hands.

 

It was would be a couple years before Minho would truly understand what he saw in Newt and Thomas.

 xxx

 

Jorge sometimes referred to Thomas and Newt as the “parents who weren’t parents” because they were so bossy.

 

Neither boy thought they were being bossy, they just worried about their family. When Minho would dare Gally to do something dangerous, it would be Newt who would convince the silent boy not to do it. When Teresa was angry at Alexandria, Thomas was the only one who could convince her not to cut all the hair off her favourite doll. Newt was always the first person Alexandria would go to for help with her homework and Thomas was the only person who could convince Albert that it was nothing personal when she did.

 

The bond the two boys had, with each other and over children, raised a multitude of questions for Jorge but he figured he would just have to wait a few years for the answers.

 

xxx

 

The nightmares got worse instead of better for Newt. His fathers’ face haunted them all, the bruises on his mothers’ face, the expression they both had on while they backed the car without hesitation, not bothering to wait for him to get out of the way. Not even giving him the chance.

 

_“This is your fault, Isaac. It’s always your fault!”_

Newt would never wake up screaming, most of the time he didn’t make noise at all. Somehow, Thomas always seemed to know. The two boys were the obvious to share a room and Newt was thankful for it. In his childish nine years of life, Newt didn’t think there had even been a person he’d be thankful for or anybody he thought it would be able to count on if he needed somebody to talk to.

 

Thomas quickly became that person and it almost scared Newt had how much he was starting to rely on the boy. He learned a long time ago that people only cared for so long before they realized it wasn’t worth it.

 

_“You useless piece of shit! You’re lucky I don’t kill you for this!”_

This time though, this nightmare was something completely different. Newt woke up sobbing, his pillow pushed up against his face. Thomas practically jumped into Newt’s bed, his feet barely touching the ground at all.

 

“Newt? Newt, what is it?” Thomas reached out for the boy, but Newt recoiled away from his touch and simply sobbed harder. “Newt, tell me what’s wrong. Did you dream about your parents again?”

 

Newt nodded into the pillow, not making any sounds other than the occasional choked sob.

 

“Was it the one where they run you over…?” Thomas asked this question carefully, what little intelligence his ten-year-old self had knowing that the subject would be touchy for Newt.

 

Newt shook his head no.

 

“What was it then, Newt?” Thomas leaned closer to him, face knotted up in confusion. “You can tell me. It’ll make you feel better.”

 

“They- they…” Newt shook his bed again. “They ran _you_ over.”

 

Thomas stared at the boy as his sobs returned, harder than before. Deciding that he had nothing to say, Thomas laid down and wrapped his arms around Newt. They soon both fell asleep.

 

When Brenda found them the next morning, many questions ran through her head but she didn’t ask any of them until many years later.

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This WAS going to be two different chapters but I decided that would be too short so I made it as one :)

“Newt. Newt. Newt. Hey, Newt.” Thomas chanted, bouncing a little on the bed while Newt attempted to do his homework. The blond shot Thomas an exasperated look but said nothing. “Newt!”

 

“For the love of God, Newt, answer him!” Minho groaned, shaking his head in annoyance. Thomas laughed lightly then threw himself forward and wrapped his arm around Newt’s body.

 

“What could possibly be so bloody important, Tommy?” Newt shook his head and wiggled out of Thomas’ grip. Thomas finally did lean back and smile.

 

“Jorge’s birthday is next week.” Thomas informed them, starting to bounce a little bit once again. Newt shook his head and smiled.

 

“I’ve never seen somebody get so excited over somebody else’s birthday before.” Newt replied before closing the lid to his computer and turning to give Thomas his full attention.

 

“We should throw him a surprise party!” Thomas cheered, starting to bounce even harder. “He’s basically our dad and he deserves it, right?”

 

Newt sighed and rolled his eyes ever so slightly towards Minho, who looked equally amused. “Tommy, I’m sure Brenda will plan something. They’re married, remember?”

 

Thomas leaned his chin on Newt’s shoulder and huffed out a breath large enough to blow some of Newt’s blond hair away from his eyes. “That’s not the point, Newt. You gotta help me!”

 

“What I’ve GOT to do is this English homework. Go bother Teresa.” Newt attempted then to turn away but Thomas grabbed hold of both his hands and pulled him closer.

“Everybody knows you’re the most organized person here, I won’t be able to do it without you.” Thomas whined, giving Newt his best- and most practised- puppy dog look. It was enough to melt Newt’s heart but he knew that if he gave in too easily than Thomas would walk all over him for the rest of his life.

 

“No.” Newt said harshly, knowing both that he would end up giving in and that Thomas knew it. “I’m not helping you. Go ask Gally.”

 

Minho was the first one to start laughing, and Newt felt a large amount of pride that it wasn’t him. Thomas’ frown became slightly more genuine and less based off getting his way.

 

“Gally hates me, Newt! You know that!” Thomas began shaking his head as though trying to get bad memories from his brain.

 

“He doesn’t _hate_ you, Tommy.” Newt sighed, struggling to hold back his smile.

 

“Yes he does.” Thomas and Minho said in unison, Minho sounding like he was enjoying this conversation way too much. Newt turned to face him, narrowing his eyes.

 

“Minho unless you want to be the one to help Tommy here, I suggest you slim it.” Newt deadpanned, enjoying the look on Minhos’ face when he finished his statement.

 

“Are you kidding me, blondie? Jorge hates me more than Gally hates Tom-boy here!” Minho shook his head. “If it wasn’t for Brenda, I would have been kicked out of here a long time ago.”

 

Newt didn’t really believe that, but in the past six years he’d learned not to argue with Minho when he got something into his head. He turned to look at Thomas, and cocked his eyebrow upwards.

 

“Oh no.” Thomas said suddenly, scooting backwards on the bed. “I don’t like that look. I don’t like it at all.”

 

“I’ll help you, Tommy…” Newt began, Thomas knowing just by the tone in Newt’s voice that there was going to be some sort of condition. “If you go into Gally’s room and confess your undying love for him.”

 

“No, Newt, no.” Thomas started shaking his head. “You can’t make me do that, come on, you’re not that cruel!”  

 

Newt simply raised his eyebrows and watched Thomas’ face go pale.

 

“Newt, come on! Aren’t we too old for this?” Thomas shook his head pathetically, and gave Newt another pout. Newt tilted his head to the side, as though he was considering it and glance over to make eye contact with Minho.

“I don’t know. What do you think, Min? Are we too old?” Newt smirked and squinted his eyes.

 

“Hmm…” Minho hummed, glancing between the two boys on the bed across from him. “Nah. It’s all good.”

 

Newt looked back towards Thomas, knowing exactly how cocky he looked. “Up to you, Tommy.”

 

Thomas groaned, and slide off the bed before exiting the room. The room that belonged to Albert and Gally was directly beside theirs, and the other two boys often complained that combination of Newt, Thomas and Minho all sharing a room was too loud. Newt couldn’t really argue that.

 xxx

Thomas came back much quicker and quieter than Newt expected and he looked up towards his friend in concern. Thomas’ face was pale and his hands were shaking, holding a piece of college ruled paper close to his chest.

 

Both Newt and Minho had jumped to their feet instantly upon seeing Thomas and had crossed the room in a matter of seconds.

 

“What’s wrong?” “What is it, Tommy?”

 

Thomas shook his head and hold the note out to the boys. Newt grabbed it quickly while Minho leaned over his shoulder to read it.

 

_Dear family (if I could call you that)_

_Something you should know… I did set that fire. I killed my family. I only got off because the court decided that I won’t have left my younger brother to die. And they were right; I had no idea he was at home._

_The guilt has been eating me up for years and I can’t do it anymore. I can’t live here while you guys all treat me so nicely and like part of the family, when I don’t deserve it. So I’m living, going to try to make it on my own._

_Don’t try to find me. It’ll only make things worse._

_I really do love you all,_

_Gally._

xxx 

In a matter of minutes, Newt, Thomas and Minho had all dressed for the cool autumn night. Newt was wearing a completely black- as usual- right down to his socks and shoes. Minho was pretty much wearing entirely black as well, pulling on the leather jacket Brenda had bought him for his most recent birthday. Thomas borrowed a black sweater from Newt since he didn’t own any of his own.

 

“Are you sure about this?” Thomas asked nervously, his hands still slightly shaking. “It might be better if just went to Brenda and Jorge. They’d know what to do.”

 

“Maybe.” Newt agreed. “But Gally would much less likely to listen to Brenda or Jorge. We have to do this ourselves.”

 

“What about Alby?” Thomas jumped in, clearly stalling for time. Hoping that Brenda and Jorge would come home from work, that they would be caught and forced to tell what they were doing.

 

Newt sighed loudly and exchanged another look with Minho. “Somebody has to stay here and look after Alexandria.”

 

“Can’t Teresa do that?” Thomas continued, rocking back and forth on his heels. Newt frowned at his friend, hurt by how upset he seemed.

 

“Do you really trust Teresa being in charge?” Minho scoffed, crossing his arms around his chest and narrowing his eyes.

 

“Is that anyway to talk about your best friend?” The female voice came from the doorway. The three boys all jumped and whipped around to face Teresa, leaning up against the door frame and smirking at them. “Where are you going?”

 

“We’re not going anywhere.” “What makes you think we’re going somewhere?” “Gally ran away and we’re going to find him and bring him home.”

 

Newt and Minho both sighed and closed their eyes for a moment before shooting Thomas a dirty look in unison. The dark haired boys’ face heated up and he smiled nervously.

 

“Sorry.”

 

“So.” Teresa pushed herself off the wall and walked closer to the three boys. “Gally ran away and instead of telling an adult and getting help, you’re going to head out into the freezing cold night yourself and look for him without having the slightest idea of where he could have gone?”

 

“That’s the exactly argument I was making.” Thomas jumped in, earning himself another dirty look from the other boys. Teresa laughed lightly and shook her head.

 

“This is by far the worst idea you guys have ever had.” She told them. “I’m in.”

 

“Wait, what?” Thomas gasped, feeling the betrayal.

 

“That’s unfortunate because you’re not invited.” Minho attempted to push past her but she reached out and held his in the room.

 

“You know, I now know your horrible plan.” Teresa pointed out raising her eyebrows with a cocky grin. “And if you don’t let me come with you, I’ll tell.”

 

Minho leaned in closer and narrowed his eyes. “How do we know you won’t tell anyway?”

 

“Because if I come with you, I’ll get in trouble, too.” Teresa pointed out, without her smirk even wavering.

 

Minho glanced over his shoulder towards Thomas and Newt, who both seemed to be thinking the same thing. It was Newt, however, who spoke it out loud.

 

“We’re shucked.”

 

xxx 

The night was even colder than they’d expected it to be, Teresa staying close between Minho and Newt to keep warm. Thomas’ teeth were chattering, both from the temperature and the fear he was feeling, and Newt reached out to hold the boy’s hand when the first rumble of thunder hit their ears.

 

“Oh, shuck.” Minho gasped, reaching out to grip the sleeve of Teresa’s jacket. “We’re so shucking shucked.”

 

Teresa ‘shushed’ him and they all continued walking forward. Thomas grip on Newt’s hand tightening with every sound that was made and Newt knew that he wanted nothing more than to be safe at home.

 

But he also knew that Thomas wanted to find Gally, too, so he wouldn’t complain.

 

“It’s okay.” Newt said softly, shifting his weight from his bad leg. Usually it didn’t bother him, but when they went for extensive amounts of movement, the muscles began to ache.

 

Thomas eyes flicked down to Newt’s leg and he tighten his grip on his hand, at the same time Newt felt Teresa’s arm slipped inside his own. He felt his face heat up, not wanting to feel like a burden on his family but he knew that the limp would be starting soon and he really did appreciate the extra help.

 

“You good, man?” Minho asked, the concern in his voice obvious.

 

“Yeah. Let’s just find him soon.” Newt said quietly, squeezing Thomas’ hand to reassure the boy that he really would be fine.

 

“Easier said than done. We have no idea where he went!” Teresa narrowed her eyes, wiping traces of rain away from her eyes.

“I have some ideas.” Minho pulled out his cell phone and punched in a number.

 

“Who are you calling?” Newt asked him, raising an eyebrow. “Minho?”

 

“Ben. He’s like, the only person Gally really connects with.” Minho replied without looking up from the screen. “If he went to anybody for help, it was Ben.”

 

“Benny baby!” Thomas, Newt and Teresa all laughed, momentarily forgetting how serious the situation really was.

 

A slow smile spread across Minho’s face and he looked towards his friend. “We better run, he’s on the move and he knows we’re closing in.”

 

The running did not help Newt’s leg at all, and after a while he was practically being supported by Thomas while the other two ran ahead.

 

“We can stop,” Thomas suggested, his voice barely audible over the sounds of the rain and wind. “They can handle it.”

 

“We’ll be twice as cold if we stop moving!” Newt shouted back. Thomas nodded in agreement before wrapping his arm more effectively around Newt’s waist and taking more weight while they ran.

 

Suddenly Minho took a drive- a literally drive, as in he threw himself to ground on purpose.

 

“What the shuck?” Thomas shouted, both him and Newt skidding to a stop. The feeling of a pause in movement caused Newt’s muscle to scream out in the protest of all the running he’d just done. If Thomas hadn’t have been holding onto him, Newt would have hit the ground himself.

 

Thomas’ eyes finally adjusted and he noticed Minho rolling around the ground, clearly struggling with somebody.

 

“Minho, don’t hurt him!” Teresa shrieked, the rain having caused her brown hair to stick to her forehead tightly. Thomas realized then that the boy underneath Minho was Gally.

 

“Minho, stop!” Thomas and Newt shouted in unison. Minho pulled away from Gally, his hands still tightened in Gally’s soaking shirt.

 

“I thought you shanks not to find me!” Gally shouted and everybody around him froze. Despite having lived together for around seven years, they had yet to hear Gally speak a word. His voice was deep- very deep- and sounded horse. Dry.

 

“Gally.” Minho spoke first, shaking his head slightly, sending droplets of water flying around. “Why the shuck would you run away, slint head?

“I can’t stay, Minho! I can’t, my brother-“ Gally gasped, shaking his head and smacking it back against the ground. Minho slid hand behind Gally’s head to prevent him from doing too much damage while smacking it off the ground.

 

“I killed my brother.” Gally’s tears ran down his face even faster than the rain was falling. “I killed him, Minho. It’s my fault.”

 

“You didn’t know he was in there, Gally.” Newt said, trying to move forward while his body thoroughly protested any sort of movement. Thomas reached out to hold onto Newt’s waist again and pulled him back. Newt leaned against Thomas’ body was surprised they didn’t both end up on the ground with Gally and Minho. “You didn’t know, it was an accident.”

 

“It wasn’t an accident.” Gally shook his head again. “Just him. Him being there was an accident. And I can’t come home now, I’ll have to go jail.”

 

“No.” Thomas spoke up. “No, Gally, you won’t. They can’t charge you for the same crime twice. It’s called Double Jeopardy.”

 

Newt glanced over at Thomas through the rain, a fond smile crossing his face. “He’s right. Even if you confess, they can’t do anything about it. Thought I don’t suggest advertising it around, Gal.”

 

Gally looked up at them, tears still glitzing his eyes. “I… you’re not disgusted by me?”

 

“Honestly, always sort of thought you did it, man.” Thomas said with a smile. Newt sighed and brushed a hand across his face.

 

“You were doing so well, Tommy.” Newt laughed slightly while Minho helped Gally to his feet. The boy was still shaking slightly and looked nervous.

 

“You sure you want me to come back with you? You can let me go…” Gally stood away from the others, putting distance in between even himself and Minho. Teresa stepped closer, not touching the boy but letting him know that she was there.

 

“What were you planning on doing, Gally? Staying with Ben for the rest of your life?” Thomas asked him, seeming on edge. Now that they had found him, it seemed that Thomas’ temporary concern for Gally was gone and the usual dislike had returned.

 

“Are you serious?” Gally asked, crinkling his eyebrows. “If you shanks knew to check Ben’s house first, do you not think Brenda and Jorge would get there first too?”

 

“Man, you’re meaner than I’d expected you to be.” Teresa said with a slight laugh. The group stayed silent for a moment, all looking at each other.

 

“You’re going to leave without me are you?” Gally asked, his face almost breaking into a smile.

 

“Yeah, but could you go back to not speaking?” Thomas asked, his voice full of a cocky attitude usual unlike him. “I think I actually like you better that way.”

 

Gally flipped Thomas off lazily before stomping off, with Minho and Teresa right behind him. Newt attempted to follow, but his leg quickly gave out and he stumbled before Thomas caught him.

 

“Here. I’ll give you a piggyback.” Thomas said, crouching down.

 

“I’m fine, Tommy.” Newt shook his head, sending droplets of water flying everywhere. Thomas shot him a look that clearly said that he wouldn’t be taking “no” for an answer, so Newt simply sighed in resignation. Then he climbed himself onto Thomas’ back while Thomas slid his arm underneath Newt’s legs to hold him up.

 

They went all the way back home like that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, chapters for a while are going to see like they are individual stories but they will all add up, I promise. <3


	9. Chapter 9

Newt jumped nearly a mile in the air when Teresa came bursting into the room.

“Newt!” Teresa cried out, flopping herself down on the bed beside Thomas, who awoke from his nap with a start, looking in around in confusion. His brown hair was tousled and Teresa reached out to ruffle it. “You’ll never guess what I just heard Minho and Gally talking to Ben about!”

Newt looked at her warily. As much as Newt loved Teresa- he did, he really did- she was hands down the sneakiness person he’d ever met. She was always spurting off information from conversation that she really shouldn’t have heard, and it made Newt slightly uncomfortable. Not uncomfortable enough not to listen what she had to say, however.

“What?”

Teresa’s face light up and she bounced slightly on the spot. Thomas shot her another nasty look as he struggled to go back to sleep. “Well, apparently Aris Jones went out to the outlook point last night with Rachel and then they just went driving… made their way down to Old Man’s Forest and they found a _dead body._ ”

Thomas sat up, completely awake now, and looked round at Newt. The boys made eye contact and Newt knew that Thomas was just an interested as he was.

“Aris thinks it belongs to Winston Jeffries.” Teresa said this more slow, as though even she knew this wasn’t something to be taken lightly. Winston Jeffries was a boy in Thomas’ grade who had disappeared about a month before, and while everybody had become pretty much convinced that Winston was never coming home, it was something completely different to have this confirmed.

“Why are you telling us this, exactly?” Thomas asked, narrowing his eyes slightly. If Newt wasn’t around, the blond boy suspected that Teresa would probably be his best friend in the house. He knew her well enough to know that she was going to be getting something out of this.

“She’s here to steal my thunder.” Minho’s voice trailed through from the doorway, a small smile on his face. “I’m here to propose that we go find it.”

The room was silent for a moment before Thomas burst out laughing. “You can’t be serious. You’re joking, right?”

Teresa shook her head, bouncing on the bed again slightly. “Nope, and I think it’s a great idea.”

Newt sighed, knowing full well that he wasn’t going to be winning this argument.

xxx

“Tommy, could you at least TRY to look unimpressed by this?” Newt complained, crossing his arms over his chest. Thomas was practically bouncing, skipping along the dirt trail leading into the forest ahead of them.

“Don’t be so grouchy, Newt!” Thomas said cheerfully, linking arms with the blond boy. “This is an adventure, it’ll be fun!”

“We’re going out in the middle of the night, without our guardians’ permission to find the body of our classmate.” Newt deadpanned. “Excuse me for not being ecstatic over the possibility of what the evening holds.”

Thomas was quiet for a moment, then smiled again. “Well, if you just ignore that then it could just be another fun thing we do!”

“Tommy, this has got to be the craziest idea we’ve ever had.” Newt shook his head. “And I’m not going to pretend otherwise.”

“You talk like an old man sometimes.” Thomas giggled, before releasing Newt’s arm and running up ahead to catch up to Minho and Teresa. Newt walked alone for a while before Minho leaned over to whisper something in Thomas’ ear. Thomas’ face turned bright red, then he turned on his heel and walked back over towards Newt.

“Oh, remembered me have you?” Newt asked, cocking an eyebrow. Thomas’ face flushed a deeper shade of red and he began playing awkwardly with his hands.

“As if I could forget you.” Thomas replied, but he said it so quietly that Newt almost didn’t hear him. A smile settled on Newt’s features, and he wrapped an arm around Thomas’ shoulder. This time it wasn’t because he needed support, but because he suspected that maybe Thomas did.

xxx

It got dark fast and Minho felt panic settling in. He wasn’t the one to let it show, but Minho was nearly terrified of the dark. In his family, the bad things always happened when it got dark and even now he couldn’t get rid of that ideal.

“What’s wrong with you?” Teresa asked him suddenly, breaking the Asian boy out of his internal panicking. “Are you okay?”

“I’m always okay.” Minho scoffed in his usual tone of self-confidence that normally wasn’t fake. He heard Newt scoffed from somewhere behind him, but chose to ignore it. “I’m perfect, actually.”

Teresa rolled her eyes, but didn’t really do a good enough job at covering up her concern. While they may bickered most of the time, Minho and Teresa were really close. With the exception of Albert and Alexandria (actual siblings), Minho and Teresa were the closest to siblings in the house. She knew him too well to be fooled by the few moments when he used fake confidence.

“Oh hey, Sir Isaac Newton.” Minho called over his shoulder, causing both Newt and Thomas to scowl at him. “Think you could make any apples appear out of thin air?”

“That’s not how it worked.” Newt called back to him, trying to keep his irritation at bay. “And don’t call me that, Xiao Yong.”

Minho narrowed his eyes at the two boys walking behind them. Newt had his arm wrapped around Thomas shoulder, and Minho could tell that it wasn’t to hold him up. They hadn’t been walking long enough for Newt’s leg to be acting up yet, and- if anything- it looked like Thomas was leaning up against him. “You two are so gay.”

“Well, yeah.” Newt laughed with an eye roll. Thomas started while both Teresa and Minho stopped in unison.

“Wait, what?” Minho and Teresa both asked, only glancing at each other momentarily before staring back at Newt in surprise.

“Well, I mean, not Tommy as far as I know but…” Newt shrugged. “I thought you guys knew.”

“Isn’t coming out supposed to be a bigger deal than this?” Minho asked, narrowing his eyes slightly. Newt titled his head to side slightly, as though he couldn’t understand Minho’s logic at all.

“Why?” He asked finally, a small smile coming over his face. Minho opened his mouth to reply, closed it quickly and a look of deep concentration came over his expression.

“Touché.” Minho nodded, and turned back to face forward. Teresa shot Newt a small smile and skipped forward to get ahead of Minho. Thomas looked closely at Newt and smiled, too.

“For the record, I suspected.” Thomas said, nodding slightly. Newt shot him a look.

“Slim it, Tommy, we all have our suspicions.” Newt smirked and pulled away, bouncing forward with a large grin across his face. Thomas stalled for a moment, eyes narrowing.

“Wait, what’s that supposed to mean?” Thomas called after him, but Newt only laughed. “Do I give off gay vibes?”

More laughter, Newt getting farther away.

“Newt! Do I give off gay vibes?”

xxx

Teresa was quieter than usual that evening, trying to recall the conversation she’d heard between Minho, Gally and Ben, just to remember exactly where they were going. She hoped that Minho would remember, because she was pretty sure that she didn’t.

It was odd, Teresa mused, that they were so thoughtless about wandering through the forest to find a dead body after all the horrors they’d seen in their lives. Minho had probably seen more dead bodies than Teresa could possibly imagine and Newt… Well, Newt wouldn’t talk about his past but lived with a permanent reminder of it. Thomas had once told Teresa and Newt in a moment of bonding that he had held his baby sister while she died.

And Teresa? Well, Teresa had seen things so awful that they made her change her name.

“Now you’re the one who doesn’t seem okay.” Minho spoke up and Teresa glanced at him, brow crinkling.

“Don’t walk around acting like you know me.” Teresa scoffed, knowing that Minho knew she was joking. If anybody really knew Teresa, it was probably Minho Xiao Yong. As much as she loved her other foster siblings, Minho just seemed the easiest to talk to. He was the only person who’d really been open about the terrible things he’s lived through before coming to Brendas’.

Minho smirked at her and patted her gently on the back. “We all need our moments.”

Teresa was pretty sure she never had- and never will- appreciate Minho Xiao Yong more than she did the night of The Body.

xxx

Falling asleep clearly wasn’t an option, but Thomas soon found himself wishing that it was. He wanted nothing more than to stop and rest, close his eyes and sleep away that unease that had settled himself in his stomach.

While he’d tried to ignore the fact that this felt just as wrong to him as it did to Newt, as the night grew later and the closer they got to where the supposed body was supposed to be, the worst Thomas felt.

“There!” Minho shouted suddenly, and Thomas’ insides went cold. He, too, could see the figure laying upon the ground- it was slightly hidden by the low bushes but something about it seemed wrong. Thomas thought it looked larger than Winston.

“Hold on.” Newt’s voice came from beside him. “Somethings’ not right.”

He step forward and Thomas fought off the urge to grab hold of his arm, pull him back. Keep him safe. Newt crotched before the body, and reached out.

“Ew!” Teresa shrieked. “Newt, what are you doing?”

Newt shushed her and pulled what looked like a wallet from the person. Newt looked at it for a moment before making a mangled, inhuman noise and jumping to his feet.

“Newt?” Thomas called out, already moving closer to the blond haired boy. Before he could make any certain movements, Newt was already running. Running faster and harder than he’d ever seen him do before. “Newt!”

Thomas chased after him, the idea to stop and see what Newt had seen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took too long to update this chapter and I'm sooooo sorry


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUYS I KNOW THIS IS TAGGED AS GRAPHIC DISPLAYS OF VIOLENCE BUT THERE IN A LOT OF STUFF IN THIS CHAPTER JUST A WARNING. YOU TECHNICALLY *CAN* SKIP IT, NOT TOO MUCH WILL BE MISSED.

“ _Isaac! ISAAC!” Newt winced and crawled underneath the bed. His father was screaming at him from the bottom of the stairs. Only a week before- the pretty woman, Brenda- had come and promised to take him away from this place but she hadn’t come back at all. Now, things were even worse because his father thought it had complained._

_“ISAAC YOU GODDAMN WHINING PIECE OF SHIT, GET DOWN HERE!” Mr Newton screamed up the stairs, the sound of his footsteps awakening an even deeper fear within the young boy. “IF YOU AREN’T DOWN HERE IN THE NEXT TEN SECONDS I AM COMING IN TO GET YOU AND THEN YOU WON’T BE HAPPY.”_

_Newt finally rolled out from under the bed and opened the door, running down the stairs. As he moved past his father on the stairs, the man reached out and shoved the door. Newt went flying down the two flights of stairs. Once hitting the bottom, Newt just laid down on the ground and squeezed his eyes shut. He knew better than to cry, his father would only punish him more for the signs of weakness._

_“GET UP BOY, GET UP.” Mr Newton continued to yell, stomping down the stairs after the boy. “We’re leaving. Now.”_

_“Leaving?” Newt asked weakly. His family never went out anywhere, this was a very odd occurrence. He sat up on his father’s command and looked up at him. His father reached out and struck him sharply. Newt’s body jerked from the force and tears stun in his eyes despite himself._

_“Course we’re leaving! You brought the goddamn police officers to my home after everything I have done for you.” Mr Newton kicked Newt in the shin, causing the small boy to roll over. “The only fucking reason I’m bringing your sorry ass with us is because I leave you behind, you’ll only cause more trouble for me.”_

_Newt winced once again, praying the maybe- for once- his father would go too far._

_Newt just wanted to be dead. Better off dead than here._

_xxx_

 

“NEWT!” Thomas screamed until his voice was hoarse. He couldn’t believe how fast Newt was running- he’d never seen Newt run that fast or for nearly that long. “NEWT, WAIT!”

But Newt didn’t even slowdown in the slightest. Thomas was only vaguely aware of Minho and Teresa yelling after him, but he also just kept up speed. If he hesitated for even a second then he might lose Newt in the dark and he couldn’t have that.

Suddenly, right in front of him, he saw Newt’s legs give out and the boy hit the ground. Thomas increased his speed as best as he could and threw himself forward. He dropped down to his knees and grabbed hold of the trembling figure on the ground.

“Newt? Newt! Are you okay? What happened?”

xxx

* _SMASH*_

_Newt managed to dodge the glass bottle that was thrown at his head, but didn’t get out of the way of the small pieces of glass that came at him afterwards. He clasped his hands over his eyes to protect them but felt the glass cut into his face._

_Newt couldn’t remember the last time he’d ate, but it didn’t even really bother him. He didn’t feel hungry anymore._

_“Goddamn, Isaac, you piece of shit. You’ve made your mother cry, look at that.” Sure enough, Mrs Newton was crying, silently and without conviction, at the table. Mr Newton reached out and smacked the crying woman directly across the face, causing both Newt and Mrs Newton to wince. “Shut up, you God forsaken woman! The worst moment of my life was getting you knocked up and having to marry this terrible bitch. Should have sued the damn condom makers, I should have.”_

_Mrs Newton glanced towards her son, and shook her head slightly. A warning, Newt knew that it was. So he simply stood there and watched his father keep insulting his mother, becoming more and more violent towards her. It was odd, because Mr Newton never got like this with his wife- he always took his aggression out on the small boy._

_“Fucking piece of shit. You’re good for you nothing, you know that boy? Good for NOTHING.”_

_xxx_

Newt was sobbing while Thomas held onto him, both boys laying on the ground in the dirt. Thomas wanted to ask again if Newt was okay, despite it being obvious that he wasn’t. Thomas felt completely in the dark, unsure of what was had upset Newt so greatly so quickly.

Newt had become so strong in the past years, he rarely even had nightmares anymore. Seeing him so utterly broken made Thomas want to start crying, too.

He reached out and stroked Newt’s hair, leaning down to press a kiss to it. “It’s okay, Newt. Just… it’s alright. You can tell me when you’re ready.”

xxx

_Newt just listened to what his father was telling him now, it made things so much easier. So here he was, standing at the end of the driveway because his father told him too._

_“And don’t you fucking move, you shithead. This is your fault and you’re going to pay for it.” Mr Newton called out from the truck window. “Everything was perfect before you decided to go whining around about how horrible we treat you. Worthless, ungrateful little bastard.”_

_The engine of the car revved and before Newt even had the chance to blink, it had moved itself down the driveway. Newt hit the ground before he felt the pain._

_But oh… once he felt it… if Newt hadn’t wanted to be dead before, he sure as hell did now._

_xxx_

“Thomas…” Teresa’s voice said behind him. “Thomas… you’ve gotta look at this.” She leaned down beside him and handed Thomas the wallet that Newt had pulled from the body. Once her hands were freed, she reached out to rub Newt’s back.

It took Thomas’ eyes a moment to adjust the image in the dark but once he did, he narrowed his eyes to see a small boy sitting in the lap of a beautiful woman. After looking at the image, Thomas started to see the familiarity of the boy.

“Holy shit.” Thomas dropped the picture and ran his fingers through his hair. “Newt…Newt is this you?”

Newt rolled over, his head landing in Thomas’ lap. “The b-b-body… It-it’s my d-d-dad. Tommy, it-it-it’s my d-d-dad!”

Newt started sobbing again, Thomas wrapping his arms around the shaking boy. Never before in his life had Thomas felt so helpless.


	11. Chapter 11

“Please don’t do this, Newt. Please.” Thomas begged, resisting every urge to his body to wrap his arms around Newt and hold him close. Prevent him from leaving.

Thomas stood in the middle of the room, watching the blond haired boy pack his belongings. The room already looked empty, though it was probably more crowded than it had ever been. Boxes stacked everywhere, filled with all the things that were Newt. It hurt Thomas physically to know that after tonight, they’d be gone. There would be no more Newt here, only the eerie lingering feeling of his presence.

“I need answers, Tommy and I’m not going to get them here.” Newt sighed, explaining this for about the millionth time. It wasn’t long after they returned from the Night of the Dead Body that Newt dropped the bomb on their little make shift family. He was leaving, already found another placement a few towns over. There had been tears and begging from everybody (even Gally surprisingly) but Newt had been firm and unshakable. He had a mission in his mind now, and nothing was going to knock him off course. Soon enough, everybody seemed to begrudgingly accept it. Everybody except Thomas that is.

He now stood in the middle of the room, tears glistening his eyes, avoiding eye contact. He was angry, Thomas hadn’t even tried to hide that. How could Newt just leave, after everything they’d been through together? They’d both been so broken when they came here, and Thomas had thought they’d help fix each other. Apparently, Newt had no appreciation for what they had. Whatever that was. Thomas had once thought he knew, but now facing a life without Newt, Thomas was started to wonder just what was between them.

“And you expect to find your answers there? How does that make any sense?” Thomas asked, one of the tears falling from his eyes. He noticed Newt’s gaze flick towards the tear and felt a pang in his chest when the boy said nothing about it.

Thomas didn’t even know what questions Newt was looking for the answers to, aside from the death of his father. Possibly what his father had been doing so close to where Newt now lived, but Thomas wasn’t even sure if that had anything to do with it. Newt had refused to give any explanation further than “needing answers.” That hurt Thomas, too, because he’d always thought that Newt was closer to him than anybody else but here they were, Newt telling just as much as he told everybody else.

“I can’t stay here. You all make me numb, I won’t be searching if I’m here.” Newt said, voice quivering.

“We don’t make you numb, we make you happy.” Thomas stepped forward, reaching out slightly.

“Same difference.” Newt gazed hard into Thomas’ eyes, not flinching at the tears that now steadily fell from his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“No you’re not.” Thomas argued, the angry bubbling up to the surface again. “But you will be.”

Thomas stepped away but felt arms wrap around him from behind. Thomas fought against them, he fought hard, but soon just succumb his emotions and leaned backwards against them, sobbing.

“I love you.” Thomas hiccupped and the grip on him tightened. “I love you and I don’t want you to leave.”

Thomas turned around in the arms, pressing his head into the crook of Newt’s neck. Newt kept his arms around Thomas, holding him tightly.

“Write me.” Newt told him. “Write me every day if you want. I want to know everything. Write me actual letters, I can keep them forever that way.”

Thomas just nodded, sobbing falling from his mouth every time he opened it to speak.

“One day, when we’re reunited, I’ll put them in a scrapbook. The letters of our story.”

“Our story?” Thomas asked, looking up slightly. Thomas knew already that he’d be crying all night. He could already feel it, Minho ignoring it like he always did. Except this time would be different than all the other times Thomas cried himself to sleep. This time there’d be no Newt to crawl into bed with him. No Newt to hold him close until the sobs stopped and sleep came to him. Thomas wasn’t sure if he’d ever be able to sleep again, he’d grown accustomed to having the blond boy by his side every night.

“Our story will be epic.” Newt assured him, titling Thomas’ head so they could look into each other’s’ eyes. “Full of bloodshed and heart break. It’ll be something right out of a Hollywood movie.”

Thomas could see in Newt’s eyes what he wanted to do and Thomas could read all over his face that he wouldn’t. Newt was too smart, too sensible. He knew that it would only make things worse, make things harder.

So Thomas was the one who closed the distance between them, pressing their lips together for the first time. Thomas had always been the risk taker, and this was the risk that would change every moment Thomas and Newt experienced from that point on.

Newt pulled away from the kiss, tears now in his own eyes. It was that which convinced Thomas that Newt wasn’t doing this because he wanted to. Newt had yet to show emotion to anything, and the tear nearly knocked the wind right out of Thomas. Newt had convinced himself that he needed to do this, and Thomas finally realized he wasn’t going to convince him otherwise.

“I’m going to write you twice a day.” Thomas told him, nodding as though to confirm his own words. “And you better come back for me.”

Newt smiled, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek, it burning the kiss like a memory being formed. “I wouldn’t leave you behind.”

Then he picked up his backpack and left the room. It wasn’t until all the boxes had been taken from the room and Newt had gone off in his new social workers’ car, did Thomas let himself cry again.


	12. Letters to the Gone

_Newt_

_I know you only left yesterday, but you said to write you every day so I’m going to. Alexandria won’t stop crying, says she misses you. The only person she’ll listen to is Teresa, which is making Alby really upset. Minho’s gotten quiet, like he doesn’t want to talk to anybody anymore. You’ve left this hole in our family and I don’t think we’ll ever be able to fill it._

_-Thomas_

_x_

_Newt_

_Janson came over last night with a file for Brenda. A boy named Chuck, his parents died in a car accident. Brenda tried to argue with him, saying there wasn’t special circumstances and that the boy should go into regular foster homes, but Janson wouldn’t take no for an answer. He’s coming to live with us next week._

_Alby and I were talking after Janson left, and we decided that he’s just worried about us. We think he wants to give us something to distract us from you leaving. But don’t worry, we’re not going to forget you Newt. You’re too important._

_-Thomas_

_x_

 

_Newt_

_ALBY HAS A GIRLFRIEND._

_He says it’s not his girlfriend, but I some them holding hands together outside of school yesterday and I KNOW that she’s his prom date. I’m not entirely sure how I feel about her, though, she seems a little off. But I guess Alby likes her and that’s what matters._

_Maybe you should call him or something? Talk to him about it? He’d talk to you, Newt. Everybody trusts you._

_Newt, you’ve turned into his sort of… taboo conversation around the house. Nobody mentions you, not directly. It’s probably been about two month since anybody had said your name. It’s so odd, you know. You’re such a huge part of who we are, and suddenly we can’t talk about you at all. It makes people upset, they miss you so much._

_The kid, Chuck, he’s only twelve. Chubby little shank but even Gally likes him. He gets along really well with Alexandria, I think she might like him even more than Minho. He’s pretty great, he’s a good kid but I’m not sure how I like the change in our room. Him in your bed, his stuff around your side of the room._

_I miss you Newt, and I want you to come home._

_-Thomas_

_x_

_Newt_

_Why don’t you ever write back? I try to keep you updated on everything going on in your life and you haven’t written me back once. I hope you’re getting my letters because if not, this is a complete waste of my time because I HATE writing by hand. You know that._

_I guess you never promised to write back, you just told me to write you so I’ll keep writing you._

_So, all the news. Chuck has a crush on Teresa, and it’s really obvious, too. He always follows her around and practically waits on her hand and foot. It would be cute if wasn’t so pathetic. Teresa sort of takes advantage of him, which is annoying. I really like Chuck and he doesn’t deserve that. I mean, everybody else knows that Teresa has a somewhat one track mind and it’s basically about her all the time. She doesn’t always see people as people most of the time. If only Chuck had talked to Minho then none of this would have happened._

_But seriously though, write me back Newt. Even just once. Even if the letter just says “hi” or something. I don’t care. Write me back._

_-Thomas_

_x_

_Newt_

_I think Alby’s relationship is taking a real bad turn but he won’t listen to me. She’s just awful. She’s bossy and mean, and Alby just caters to her completely. She yells at him for everything and basically every time he tries to speak she just tells him to shut up. Even in front of the family._

_I can tell everybody else is concerned too, but Alby keeps telling us that there’s nothing to worry about. I want to trust his judgement, Alby has always been smart, but I just… I don’t know what to do, Newt. I want to help him, but I can’t think of anything to do._

_I’m writing to you because I feel like you might be able to help. Newt, you’ve always been the best Ask Abby in the group and that hasn’t changed just because you left. Can you please try to get hold of Alby? I know you have a lot on your mind right now, looking for whatever answers you need but… Newt, I’m really concerned. Just… can you please try? If not for me, for Alby._

_-Thomas_

_x_

_Newt, I love you._

_I love you, I love you and I will always love you. I would kiss you in the pouring rain or stand under your window with a radio and play your favourite song. I would scream it from the tallest buildings in the world._

_I love you, Isaac Newton, and I will love you forever. I will wait for you, even if you’ve moved on. Even if you never come back to me. I know you said you wouldn’t leave me behind but I’m not going to hold it against you. You just… come if you can, if you want to._

_But Newt, I need you to know that I’m not moving on from you. I could never. I love you. And I know you want answers and you’re going to see the world or whatever, but… If you come back, we could have everything, Newt. We could have forever._

_X_

 

_Newt_

_Okay, fine. Chuck is still slightly obsessed with Teresa but I think he’s starting to see that it’s not going to happen. Alby’s still in a relationship that I’m pretty sure is fucking toxic (but you don’t seem to care about that so whatever) and Minho is basically a permanent state of pissed off. Not that I blame him, the person he’d been closest to for years ditched him and cut off all communication. I know how he feels._

_Brenda and Jorge have been fighting, too, but that probably doesn’t concern you much either. Even though if they get divorced, we all lose our home and have to go into the system._

_Sometimes I just want to say “fuck you” and not write anymore. You probably don’t even read these letters and you clearly don’t care enough to answer if you do. Either way, every time I say “I’m not going to write him again. This is the last letter” and then I find myself writing to you again. I don’t even understand myself anymore, you were always the thing about me that made the most sense._

_I need my sense back, Newt._

_-Thomas_

_x_

 

Newt never sent his letters to Thomas, they all sat on his desk in envelopes. They were all the same.

_Tommy, I’m sorry. I love you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise this hurts me as much as it hurts you :(


	13. Chapter 13

_Newt_

_Teresa has a boyfriend, his name is Aris. He seems like a nice guy (much better fit to the family than Alby’s girlfriend). Chuck cried for three hours when he found out. I felt bad for him but there was nothing I could do to help. I was never good at comforting._

_I heard Jorge and Brenda fighting last night, he accused her of cheating. Brenda wouldn’t cheat on Jorge, I know it but the idea of them splitting up is unbearable. I don’t know what I’d do if I lost them too._

Thomas sighed loudly and placed his pen down. Why did he even bother anymore? Newt wasn’t going to write back, he probably wasn’t even reading the letters at all.

Thomas twiddled his fingers mindlessly, everything that had happened in the past six months rolling through his head. Suddenly he filled with such an insane amount of anger he wanted to punch something. He wanted to punch everything. He picked up the pen again instead.

_I blame you. I blame you so much it hurts me. You walked away from us, ripping something away from us that we can’t find again. You broke something that we will never be able to fix. You left more damaged than you found us and I didn’t even think it would be possible for that to happen._

_My mother starved me and I held my infant in my arms while she died, but it wasn’t them who broke me, Isaac Newton, it was you. It was the boy with the pure smile and golden blond hair with tears that fell like rain every night. I love you so much it burns a hate fire inside me. How dare you pretend to love us then leave us to die?_

_This is the last letter I’m going to write you, and I mean it this time. Don’t expect to hear from me again. Don’t bother writing me either, because I don’t think I can handle anything you have to say to me anymore. I’ve waited long enough for you. I’ll never love another the way I love you, but I hope I never have to._

Tears dropped down onto the paper and Thomas wiped them away from his eyes quickly.

xxx

Thomas walked around his life in numb sense of sadness for several days until he came home from school one day to a letter sitting on his desk. Recognized the return address instantly, even if he’d never seen it as a return address before.

It was Newt. Newt had written to him. Thomas ripped the letter open and started reading it before he remembered the promise he’d made to himself.

_Tommy, I need you to read this and try to understand me for a second here._

_I never promised to write you back, simply because I knew it would be too hard. I wrote you a bunch of times, but the letters never seemed good enough. I tried and tried to think of something, but I couldn’t tell you what I was doing, it wouldn’t be fair to have you pour your heart about your problems and have me not tell you anything._

_Thought I suppose not answering your letters at all is worse, isn’t it? I didn’t want to make you think I didn’t love you, Tommy- that I didn’t love any of you- I just thought it would be easier that way._

_I know you said you won’t write me again, and I respect that but I thought that I should tell you that I’m leaving this place, I’m going somewhere else. The mailing address is attached in case you ever want to contact me again._

_As far what’s going on, don’t worry too much about Brenda and Jorge. I know things probably seem bad right now, but they’ve already gone through a lot together. I have faith that they’ll pull through this, Tommy, and you should, too. As for Alby… You can only help him so much. He’s going to have to help himself. I don’t know many details, so I’m sorry that I can’t be much more help to you._

_I’ve found something that I think might be helpful to my mission, and I’m going even farther away now. The only way you’d know that I was leaving is if I tell you myself, as Brenda and Jorge are no longer my guardians they do not need to updated on what I am doing. All I can tell you about my mission is that involves finding out about my fathers’ death, what he was doing so close to where I lived, and where my mother is. I hope that is enough for you, because I don’t know how dangerous this might be and I don’t want to drag you anymore into this than you already are._

_And Tommy?_

_If you love me- truly love me- let me go._

Thomas threw the letter down and kicked the chair beside him. He was more than angry, he was beyond furious. It hurt more than he thought it would to know that Newt had been reading his letters- all of them- and just not bothering to reply. Thomas didn’t believe the statement that Newt just couldn’t think of anything to say because he seemed to have found the right words pretty easily when he thought that Thomas wouldn’t be writing anymore.

And what was that “if you love me, let me go” crap? When did Newt become such a martyr? Thomas didn’t understand why Newt had be so miserable while looking for his answers. Besides, hadn’t Thomas sent Newt several letters telling him that he loved him and would never move on from him? He was pretty sure he had. Nothing had changed since then. It never would


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Less than 1k and I'm so sorry :( also some not very descriptive NSFW stuff at the beginning but the rating will be going up in the next chapter! Uhh... sorry for the angst, I'd tell you it gets better soon but that might be a complete and total lie :) meh. xoxo

Newt leaned down, body slightly above Thomas and pressed his lips to the boy underneath him. Thomas gasped at the feeling and moaned into Newt’s mouth.

The blonds’ hand trailed downwards, brushing lightly over Thomas’ legs. Newt grabs hold of the boys’ legs and wrapped them around his waist.

“Newt.” Thomas sighed, running his hands through the blond strands. He wanted to touch Newt, touch him everywhere and then trace his touches with his lips. This what he wanted, what he’s wanted for longer than he could even admit to himself.

“Are you sure about this?” Newt asked him, his voice ragged and slightly hoarse. Thomas looked Newt dead in the eye, gazing right into those soft brown eyes and smiled.

“I’ve wanted this ever since I figured out about this.” Thomas gestured towards his hardening erection and fidgeted on the bed. “I want you.”

A genuinely sweet smile crossed Newt’s face and he leaned down. His fingers were inches away from Thomas’ cock when a long bang woke him with a start.

Thomas awoke, sweating and panting in the empty room. He always felt guilty after waking up from a dream about Newt- especially dreams like that. He was always concerned that he’d say… things in his sleep, things Minho would hear. Embarrassing things.

Usually though, Thomas would have at least finished. Now, however, he was guilty and insanely turned on. His body felt as felt as though it was on fire, and he withered against the bedsheet. Thomas cursed Minho for being so loud, couldn’t he have just left the room quietly?

Having dreams about Newt was one thing, Thomas couldn’t help that. The need to release was taking over everything, and Thomas’ soul fought against what he needed to do.

_If you love me- truly love me- let me go._

This was NOT letting Newt go, it wasn’t letting him go at all. Thomas whimpered and slipped his hand into his boxers and sighed at the contact.

Biting his lip to hold back any noises he’d make, Thomas moved his hand smoothly up and down his length with images of Newt rushing through his mind. With a muffled moan of “Newt!”, Thomas came.

Tears prickling in the corners of his eyes, Thomas threw the covers over his head. He didn’t want to leave this bed, he didn’t think he’d ever be able to face his family ever again after that.

xxx

Newt stood at the end of the all too familiar driveway and sighed. The house looked as though they were getting ready for the day, people getting dressed and eating breakfast. He didn’t even know why he was here, not really. He tried to tell himself that it was because this was where it started. His mom had lived here in her youth, Newt had lived here, and his father had died here. In reality though, Newt was probably here so that he could see Thomas. Though, as much as he wanted to see him, Newt hoped he never would have to again.

Newt had hurt Thomas, he knew that. He’d hurt Thomas in ways that he’d never be able to make up, and in ways that Thomas didn’t deserve after everything he’d been through. Thomas had tried to hold them together, and Newt had just pushed him away. Although the blond knew that they’d never really been together, he couldn’t help feeling like he was going to through the worst break up in history.

Stepped back slowly, Newt put his headphones back into his ears and attempted to drown out his feelings with the loudest Metallica song he had in his library.

xxx

“You don’t understand.” Thomas said, shaking his head. “I’m not going with you, because I don’t want to. The end.”

“No.” Minho said with a head shake. “You’re not going out with me tonight because you’re moping over Newt. Still.”

Thomas glared at Minho, then shook his head. “You’re wrong but I won’t be able to change your mind.”

Minho nodded his satisfaction. “Exactly. So you’re coming. Gally and Alby are going, too, and probably Teresa if she catches us leaving.”

Thomas and Minho shot each other little smirks at thought of Teresa _not_ catching them. It seemed impossible. Thomas nodded slowly, realizing that Minho wasn’t going to give up on this. A part of him didn’t even want to, not because Thomas wanted to head out to party but because this was the first time that Minho was making any sort of effort to hang out with Thomas in months. Since Newt (and ouch, there was that horrible feeling again. Happened every time Newt crossed Thomas’ mind) left, it had been like a brick wall had been thrown up between Thomas and Minho. It seemed that Minho was just as eager to knock the wall down, and Thomas certainly wasn’t going to stop him. After everything that was happening, Thomas and Minho needed each other.

xxx

The party was loud and Newt didn’t even know what brought him here. It was like some all-powerful force had dragged him from the motel was hiding out in and pushed him here. Now he was here, and the anxiety was started to bubble over.

Newt leaned up against the wall, feeling very similar to drowning. This wasn’t the sort of thing he got anymore, Newt thought he had closed himself from all the feelings. He thought the person he used to be was gone, gone forever. Coming back here had been a mistake.

Somebody grabbed Newt from behind and crushed him up against the wall. Everything was blurry for a second until his eyes adjusted. Standing in front of him, looking truly enraged, was Gally.

“You’re not supposed to be here.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's smut here, and it was a pain to write (that's why I took so long to update!). So, if you're uncomfortable with the smut then you can stop reading once it starts, no other plot happens afterwards.

Chuck sat at home alone with Alexandria while the rest of the family went out to the party. Being only twelve, they didn’t really get the same opportunities as the other kids did. They were often left behind, which wasn’t something Chuck handled well. He was in a permanent state of separation anxiety, which despite Brenda and Jorge being some of the most wonderful people he’d ever met, it was something that nearly paralyzed Chuck on times.

He was laying down on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. This still didn’t feel like his bed yet, and he doubted that it ever would. It didn’t feel like Chuck’s bed to Thomas or Minho, either, the younger boy could tell easily. To them, the bed would always belong to the boy who’s had it before. Isaac Newton.

Chuck knew the rest of the family didn’t understand why Newt had left, but Chuck himself could see it. As accepting as this place seemed, there were things that showed through every crack in the wall.

These kids were troubled, they were all troubled. They all had these terrible, terrible pasts that nobody would talk about. Things probably couldn’t get better for them unless they talked about things but nobody- Chuck included- wanted to.

Alexandria seemed to appear out of nowhere and climbed up onto the bed beside him. Lying her head back, her black curls flew over the pillow. She smiled shyly at him.

“Are you sad again?” She asked carefully, playing with the skin around her finger nail. Chuck realized quickly that he was staring at the girl and looked away nervously.

“I’m not sad, Lex.” Chuck assured her. “Just… feeling sort of… down, you know?” Chuck nodded at the pretty girl.

Alexandria had grown up well, gaining weight in the perfect places. She’d been the girl that all the boys want someday soon, and that simply fact was enough to give Alby and Minho slight heart attacks. Which never ceased to amuse Chuck.

Alexandria rolled over and rested her head on her hands. She looked Chuck directly in the eye and smiled at him. “I don’t want you to feel down, Chuckie. You can talk to me if you want to.”

Chuck looked at her nervously. He’d ever opened up to anybody before, simply because he’d never thought about it before. Aside from Brenda, nobody had tried to get him to open up and it had always felt wrong talking to her about anything because she was an adult.

Except Alexandria wasn’t an adult, and there really wasn’t any reason not to tell her. Before Chuck finished coming to his conclusion that he would talk to the girl, Alexandria had begun to speak again.

“When I was a kid, there was never enough food in the house for us to eat.” She said, not looking up from the pillow. “My brother and I were starving, we could stick our fingers in between our rib cages. Our parents didn’t care, they always had enough food for themselves.”

“My dad put a padlock on the fridge. My mother and I were only allowed to eat when he came home from work.” Chuck spoke up, his voice breaking slightly. It felt like a betrayal to his mother to be telling this stories. She’d done everything she could for Chuck, it just hadn’t been enough to save them.

Alexandria nodded and seemed to move slightly closer to Chuck, the smile on her face not wavering. Here was a girl who seemed so close to perfection that it boggled Chuck’s mind but she wasn’t thrown by his baggage because she got it. She had it, too, even if she did a better job at hiding it.

“One time my father left me on bus. I rode around on it all day, hoping that he’d remember he forgot me and come back for me.” Chuck continued to spill his darkest life secrets. “My mother came for me and it wasn’t until she brought me home that I realized my father hadn’t forgotten- he’d left me on the bus on purpose.”

Alexandria reached out and took hold of Chuck’s hand. “Do you have any good memories?”

Chuck paused for a second to think, that question neither being one he expected nor one he’d received before. “The day of my grandfathers’ funeral. My father went alone so it was just my mother and I all day. She pulled out all these hidden money I had no idea she’d put away and we went down to the carnival. We spent all the money that I know we should have saved, but I didn’t care. It was the best day of my life.”

Tears prickled the corners of Chuck’s eyes at the thought of his mother and Alexandria rested her head on his shoulders. “There’s a county fair next weekend. We should go.”

### xxx

“You’re not supposed to be here.” Gally growled in Newt’s face. The blond boy pulled away and shoved Gally slightly.

“Well I wasn’t bloody expecting to see you here either, shank.” Newt hissed, eyes narrowing.

“You’re in our home town and didn’t expect to see of us at a party?” Gally scoffed with an eye roll. “I know why you’re here, Newton, and I’m telling you to stop. You ripped our family apart.”

“So I’ve been told.” Newt said, the sadness sinking into his voice. He blinked back tears and noticed that momentary pity that flashed on Gally’s face. When Newt had said he was leaving, Gally had been the most understanding. While Minho got angry, Thomas cried and Alby pleaded, Gally just accepted it and wished him luck. Newt had valued Gally very much during that time.

“Don’t do this to him, Newt. Stay away from Thomas.” Gally threatened, but the angry in his voice dissipated.

“I didn’t even know Tommy was here. I’m not going to do anything.” Newt told him sincerely. Gally didn’t look even slightly convinced and moved away from Newt without another word. Newt took several deep breaths and wondered how the hell he was going to get out of his party without being spotted by anybody else he once knew.

“Newt?” The voice sent chills throughout his whole body and before any rational thought could cross his mind, Newt was running. He ran through the house, dodging bodies coming at him from any direction and rushed into the closest room.

Thomas jumped in right after him, moments before Newt went to close to the door. Groaning in defeat, Newt through himself down on the large bed and buried his face in the pillows.

“Newt, why didn’t you tell me you were coming back?” Thomas asked, stepping close to the bed but not actually sitting down on it. “Newt?”

“The occasion sort of sprung itself on me,” Newt mumbled into the pillow, refusing to move his head. He didn’t want to look at Thomas, couldn’t stand to see him. He knew that if he laid eyes on the boy his resolve to make this trip temporary would fade immediately and he’d never be able to leave Thomas’ side again. “Course, after everything I’ve put you through, didn’t think you’d bloody want to see me Tommy.”

Thomas was quiet for so long that Newt begun to wonder if he had left the room completely. Just as he was about to move his head to see, Thomas spoke, his words soft and full of emotion.

“Newt from the day I meant you, there hasn’t been a single moment where I didn’t want to see you.”

The words broke through to Newt’s heart, a piece of him that he’d vowed to bury the night he’d found his father’s dead body, and he jerked away from the bed. Gazing into Thomas’ cognac eyes, Newt found words evading him. So, he sat there, gaping at Thomas for much longer than would be acceptable.

“Newt.” Thomas said. It wasn’t a question, there was hesitation in his voice. It was almost as though the simple name was a word that had been missing from his vocabulary, stolen from his memory and finally returned with a rush of emotion.

“Tommy.” Newt had to force the word out, it was something he hadn’t spoken in a long time. Too long, really. He’d missed the nickname, the simplicity of it, the ring of childhood and happy days it held.

Then they were kissing, and this time was different than the first. This kiss wasn’t overwhelmed by tears, and this kiss wasn’t because it was goodbye. This kiss had potential and was leading to something else, something bigger. Something that would have happened ages ago if Thomas and Newt had just been able to live normal lives forever.

Thomas’ hands found their way into Newt’s hair and gripped it, as though afraid he would disappear. The promise Newt had made to Gally just minutes earlier faded away once Thomas’ tongue brushed against his own, coaxing out a moan from both boys. Newt’s hands gripped at Thomas hips and pushed towards him, their bodies touching in nearly every way possible.

The world spun around for a second before Newt realized that Thomas had pushed him back up against the pillows. Newt wasn’t even entirely sure whose bed this was, but he found himself unbothered. His entire world was a state of _Tommy, Tommy, Tommy_ right now and he wouldn’t have it any other way. Although this whole being on the bottom thing wasn’t going to work for him.

Flipping Thomas over, Newt pushed him down into the mattress with a short grind of his hips. He felt Thomas’ hardening cock brush against his own and they both gasped at the sensation. Thomas took hold of Newt’s face and pushed his lips away, causing confusion to settle on the blonds’ features until lips pressed up against his neck.

Newt moaned at the feeling and thrust his hips against his own will. For a moment, Newt was blinded by the sensation to realize just what was happening to his own body.

“Wait!” Newt gasped out, the words being followed by a moan when Thomas nipped at the spot he’d been sucking. “Wait, don’t- don’t mark me. You’ll get me in trouble.”

Thomas moved away from Newt’s neck in an instant and moved to remove his shirt. Newt grinded down against Thomas once the fabric had been skillfully taken off, and they continued this movement until the feeling of clothes against their skin became too much.

“The door.” Thomas gasped out, gripping at Newt’s bare shoulders. “I didn’t close the door!” Newt groaned and removed himself from the bed to do the tedious task. Upon return, Newt stopped mid stride to admire the sight; the obvious bulge in Thomas’ jeans, while the burnet withering and whimpered on the bed. It sent a rush of pleasure through Newt to know that he was the cause of this.

Newt reached down to remove his jeans, struggling with the belt buckle for a moment. Once they had been removed themselves, Newt glanced up to find Thomas removing the last inch of his clothing himself. Newt smiled at the over eager boy and moved back to the bed. Climbing on top of Thomas, their skin touched for the first and moans echoed through the room.

Newt moved his hands lower, resting it just inches from where Thomas wanted it to be. Thomas bucked his hips in response to the light touch and whimpered. “Newt, please.” Thomas wasn’t entirely sure what he was pleading for, he’d never done anything close to this before, but he just knew that he needed more.

Newt smirked at him and leaned down to press a quick kiss to the side of Thomas face before taking Thomas truly in his head. Thomas clasped his hand over his mouth to smother the embarrassing noises that came loudly and instantly to the touch of Newt.

Newt moved his hand slowly- teasingly slowly- and pressed kisses to Thomas’ tighs. For a fleeting second, Thomas wondered if Newt was going to suck him off. If he was going to kiss Thomas at the source of all this.

Newt continued moving his hand slowly as he pressed his lips against Thomas’ cock and licked upwards. Thomas couldn’t control the sounds now, no matter how hard he pressed his hand to his mouth.

“This okay?” Newt called up to him, rolling his thumb across the head quickly. Thomas nodded quickly, not trusting his ability to speak coherently at a time like this. Newt smiled again- not a smirk, a smile- before moving wrapping his lips around the head.

Newt felt Thomas’ cock twitch in his mouth, which encouraged him. Thomas reached down to entangle his hands in Newt’s blond hair. Newt hummed at the feeling and removed his mouth to tongue around the curvature. Thomas thrust upwards causing Newt to reach his hand upwards to pin his hips to the bed.

With a simple cocky eyebrow raise, Newt moved back down to what he was doing. He took Thomas in completely, bobbing his head in rhythm with the way his tongue moved around the inside of his lips. Thomas wanted to tell Newt how good it felt, how hot he looked but all that left his mouth were wonton moans and whimpers.

Right as Thomas was feeling as though he was going to cum, Newt pulled off with a sinful pop. Thomas groaned and arched his back in frustration.

“Why?” He whined, withering against the sheets.

Newt giggled- _giggled-_ and shook his head. “Not done with you yet, Tommy. Be patient.”

“You could finish me off now.” Thomas gasped, impressed with his ability to speak. “I’ll be ready to go again in a few minutes anyway.” Newt just laughed and pressed a kiss against Thomas’ thigh. There a moment of hesitation before Newt began kissing lower.

“What are you- _holy- Newt!_ ” Thomas gasped out and arched his back upwards as Newt spread out Thomas and pressed his tongue against his entrance. “Oh my fucking-“

Thomas’ mind went blank with the pleasure, the feeling of Newt’s tongue against him. Thomas arched his back as high as he could manage and moaned without restraint. He realized that the people at the party could hear him, and that he would have to face them all at school on Monday… Thomas just didn’t care. The only thing that mattered in the world right now was Newt and the way Newt was making him feel.

When Newt’s hand reached upwards to wrap around Thomas’ cock, Thomas whimpered and thrust his hips upwards. After one thrust, Thomas wasn’t sure if he wanted to push upwards Newt’s hand or down towards his mouth, so he settled for fisting his hands in the bedsheets and moaning until his throat was sore.

Thomas’ orgasm took him by surprise, covering his Newt’s hand, then his own chest. Panting, Thomas closed his eyes tightly and prayed that when he opened them Newt wouldn’t be gone.

And he wasn’t. When Thomas’ eyes opened, Newt was leaning over him, eyes darkener than Thomas had ever seen. His cock was hard and leaking, leaning red against Newt’s stomach and Thomas realized it must have gotten painful long ago. Reaching a tentative hand out, Thomas took hold of the member and began his movements.

From the thrust of his hips and high octave of his moans, Thomas supposed that Newt wasn’t going to last every long. So he pushed himself up onto his elbow and whispered sweet nothings into the blond boys’ ear until Newt gave a broken sob while he came.

Newt collapsed on top of Thomas, ignoring the mess. For a moment, they had peace and both boys wished they never had to return to humanity and that they could just stay here forever.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A magical chapter appears which is mostly cute filler but also the Newt part is dark af and holds implications to rape/sexual abuse.

When Thomas woke up, Newt was gone. Not in the awkward morning-after sense, either. They’d peacefully parted ways the night before, with a sweet kiss goodbye. Newt had given Thomas the room number of the hotel he was staying at.

No, when Thomas woke up, Newt had left town. The motel said he checked out the second he’d gotten back the night before, and there was no sign of Isaac Newton anywhere.

Thomas knew better than to bring it up. The only other person who’d known that Newt was in town that night was Gally, and Gally certainly didn’t need to be told what happened between the two boys. Not after the warning he’d given Newt.

He wanted to believe that Newt had his reasons for leaving, that he hadn’t just simply deserted Thomas. That Thomas wasn’t just some one-night stand that he didn’t care about at all. He wanted to believe that he might more to Newt than that, and that Newt would come back for him when he finally got the chance.

So, predictably, Thomas awaited a letter that probably wasn’t going to come.

### xxx

 

“So what’s the mark on your neck from then?” Newt’s current foster mother, Linda, sat across from him in the living room. She was a widower without any children of her own, and Newt was her first foster child. When he’d been placed here, his social worker had told him that she was a bit of an offbeat but was a generally nice women who just didn’t want to be alone.

Newt didn’t know what extends he would be forced to go to for her not to feel alone anymore.

“I don’t know. I didn’t do anything.” Newt assured her, sort of wanting to cross his fingers behind his back for lying. It was a childish thing to do, something he, Thomas and Minho all agreed they had outgrown in fifth grade but maybe Newt needed a little bit of childhood right now.

“You said you were going to get answers about your father and I believed you. Silly me, huh?” Linda stood up and walked across the room to the boy. Newt tried not to flinch and hoped he succeeded. Weak was never something he wanted to come across as, if this was going to happen he wanted to be in control as much as possible.

Linda stepped in front of him, reaching her hand out to caress his leg. “Were you with another girl? A boy, maybe? Your social worker mentioned that little phase of yours. Don’t worry, I’m not mad.”

Newt stared her down, refusing to look away. He was going to look her in the eye, just like the time before that and the time before that. The little boy who’d cried and pleaded for her to stop was long gone. She’d killed and buried him a long time ago.

“It’s fine if you did.” Linda smiled at him. “I’ll just have to remind you who you belong to.”

She pushed him backwards into the chair and climbed on top of him

### xxx

Teresa and Aris sat together in the back of his car, cuddled up together. His hands ran through her hair and hers danced underneath his shirt. It wasn’t sexual- not at the moment- but it was intimate and mattered to them.

“Did I ever tell you that I used to like Minho?” Teresa asked suddenly, whispering as though her words would be broadcast to the entire world if she spoke too loudly.

“You never told me but I sort of figured.” Aris replied with a shrug. “I could see it in the way you acted. Which is also how I knew when you started liking me back.”

Teresa looked upwards and smiled softly at her boyfriend. The idea that she had ever liked Minho seemed crazy to her now, she couldn’t really imagine herself with anybody that wasn’t Aris.

“Being with Minho would be like being with a brother. I can’t believe I ever liked him, honestly.” Teresa laughed lightly, burring her face further into Aris’ neck.

Aris was quiet for a moment before speaking. “What about Newt and Thomas?”

Teresa looked up at him again, her eyes more serious this time. “They don’t count. Newt and Thomas are soulmates, they would have found each other even without Brenda and Jorge.”

Aris nodded, tightening his grip on the girl. “Are you sure? They seem pretty far apart now.”

“They’ll figure it out.” Teresa spoke with confidence. There was never a moment where she doubted the bond between Newt and Thomas. “If any couple will make true love exist, it’s them. We’ve just got to give them time.”

### xxx

 

“I swear to God if Newt did something to Thomas, I’ll kill him.” Gally growled under his breath, pressing the buttons on the controller much harder than necessary. Ben looked at it with concern in his eyes, as though he was considering taking it away before it got broken.

“Why do you care so much?” Ben asked cautiously. “I thought you hated the guy.”

Gally sighed in frustration and tossed the controller to ground when he lost once again. Ben winced at the sound of the controller smacking against the floor but chose not to say anything.

“It’s not even about Thomas, it’s about Newt. He left us and he ripped us apart when he did it.” Gally shook his head slowly, an inch of sadness coming into his features underneath the anger. “While Thomas might irritate the hell out of me, at least he isn’t a traitor. I don’t want to see anybody else in my house be hurt by Newt again. And that boy has no loyalty.”

Ben shook his head. “I don’t think you’re right, Gal, not about this.”

The two boys made eye contact, Gally narrowing his in suspicion.

“If there’s anybody in this world Newt cares about, it’s Thomas. I think leaving him behind was really hard for him and it will keep being hard.”

Gally huffed in annoyance. “I don’t care how hard it was. As long as he doesn’t rip everything apart again. Things were just starting to get good again.”

“Were they starting to get good or were you all getting better at acting?”

### xxx

“Allison is so badass.” Alexandria said, gesturing towards the screen. Chuck glanced at her for a short moment and smiled.

“She’s my favourite. I can’t believe they never even showed her funeral.” He said, wondering if Alexandria would allow him to hold her hand.

“I know, right?” Alexandria sighed, leaning her head against Chuck’s shoulder. “I mean, poor Lydia and Scott. Not to mention that we haven’t seen Isaac at all since she died!”

Chuck shook his head, smiling. The two of them had gotten so excited over the promo for season five that they decided to marathon the first four seasons.

“Maybe we could just watch until Allison’s death.” Alexandria said suddenly. “Avoid that cluster fuck of a fourth season.”

“Yeah but then we wouldn’t get the see Malia being badass.” Chuck pointed out. “She’s no Allison, but she’s really great.”

“You probably just think Shelley Hennig is hot.” Alexandria rolled her eyes and tapped her finger against the top of Chuck’s hand. “Though I guess she’s alright, I just don’t like her with Stiles.”

Chuck nodded in complete agreement, knowing that the two of them couldn’t get into another argument about Sterek versus Stydia. At least they could both agree that Stiles would never love anybody the way he loved Scott.

“Hey, do you think that Stiles kind of looks like Thomas?” Chuck asked her suddenly causing Alexandria to narrow her eyes.

“Yeah, I guess.” Alexandria shrugged and slid her hand into his. “If Thomas was hot.”


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, I'm sorry :( There's a suicide scene... well, suicide attempt because no character death but yeah. :( I'M SORRY

“Shut up!” Minho laughed whacking Teresa in the back of the head lightly. The three kids sat together at the lunch table and all tried to ignore the seat that was still empty from Newt’s absence almost a year earlier.

Every time Newt came to Thomas’ mind it caused a twinge of pain in his heart. He wanted to write to Newt a million times since he found that he was gone. However, he knew that the ball was in Newt’s court now. If anything good was going to happen between them after this, he needed Newt to come to him. Thomas couldn’t keep chasing Newt, he knew it would just end up pushing the boy he loved away.

“Hey, Thomas. Earth to Thomas!” Minho waved his hand in front of Thomas’ eyes. “I’m going to assume by your neutral expression that you have no idea what we’re talking about.”

“Uh…” Thomas blushed, embarrassed that he’d been caught day dreaming about Newt. “No?”

Teresa sighed and exchanged a dark look with Minho. “Probably a good thing.”

Thomas glanced back and forth between his two siblings before sighing. “Alright, I’ll bite. What’s going on?”

“We’re just discussing how we’re going to get you laid my friend.” Minho smacked his hand against the table and smirked at Thomas. “You’re way too old to still be a virgin.”

Thomas felt his face heat up and fought the urge to run away. He hadn’t told Minho or Teresa what had happened between himself and Newt at the party that weekend, mostly because he couldn’t predict how they would react. It seemed easier to just not bring it up rather than try to deal with unpredictable reactions.

That is, it was easy enough until Minho starting talking about the virginity of somebody who wasn’t a virgin anymore.

Thomas chose the best response-, which was probably not a wise response in the end, but he really couldn’t think of anything else- and just laughed awkwardly before glancing back down at the table.

“What’s wrong with you?” Teresa asked carefully, cocking an eyebrow at him. “You’ve been acting very odd lately.”

“You’ve been off since Justins’ party on Saturday.” Minho said slowly, as though trying to piece together bits of his foggy and messy memories of the night. Thomas shook his head quickly and pushed himself away the table. Without looking back at all, Thomas hurried from the caf and prayed that he could get himself so privacy somewhere. Anywhere.

“Thomas! Thomas, wait!” Teresa called after him. Thomas refused to stop for her, knowing that tears were burning in his eyes. He couldn’t handle this. He couldn’t.

Xxx

Newt couldn’t handle this anymore. He couldn’t. He sat on his bedroom floor, staring up at the ceiling. He couldn't just stay here and let this continue, he knew it was wrong. He knew it was wrong when she made him shower with the door open, he knew it was wrong when she'd crawl into bed with him at night, he knew it was wrong when she whispered "I love you" in his ears after she'd finished using him.

He looked over to the bottle of pills sitting on his bedside table. Linda's anti depressiants, he knew that. She must have lied about them in order to be considered for foster care. Or maybe not, Newt wasn't really sure how strict the rules were for this sort of thing. He knew other kids had placements much like his or worse, so he sometimes wondered if there were any at all.

He took the bottle in his hand, and looked at them. He knew how to do this. You took them one at night, maybe two. If you swallow the entire bottle, your body tries to reject them. You're more likely to throw them up than anything. If you were going to do it, you had to be smart about it.

Which was a funny concept in itself. If you were going to kill yourself, you had to be smart about it.

Newt's thoughts moved towards Thomas and the night they spent together. In a life were sex was a horrific and unwanted experience for the boy, the night he'd spent with Thomas had seemed like a light at the end of a very dark tunnel. For a short moment, Newt had had hope for what good could come from his life. He could never go back to Linda, he could stay with Thomas in that bed forever. Of course, he'd known that it wasn't true but it had still been a nice thought.

Newt had loved Thomas since he was child, and being with Thomas was what he'd wanted since he'd been mature enough to want something like that. Newt had been holding onto to himself in hopes that he could someday spend a forever with Thomas, but now even that hope was gone. Newt had had Thomas and he'd thrown it away. It was entirely his fault but he was now alone and Thomas probably hated him. Hated him more than he ever would have thought possible. Newt could always feel Thomas unloving him.

Which had been what he'd wanted all along, wasn't it? _If you love me- truly love- let me go._ Thomas hadn't been able to truly let Newt go, so Newt had pushed him there. He'd done the most unforgivable thing and now the love- and the trust- between the boys were different. He'd made Thomas let go. And now, maybe, it was his turn to let go.

Newt popped back two pills

xxxx

Something was wrong, something was very, very wrong. Brenda and Jorge seemed panicked as they rushed around the house and spoke in hushed whispers. It had been many years since Brenda and Jorge had attempted to keep secrets from the teens in the house, they'd excepted long ago that they weren't taking care of children anymore and that keeping things from them was probably bad for trust.

Minho watched Brenda closely, knowing that she was even more distressed than she was letting on. He wondered briefly if she was worried over a child she was working the case on, but he could soon see that wasn't the case. Brenda was much too panicked, this was something that affected her personally. It was something close to her, something that was hurting her.

"What's going on?" Alexandria asked, coming up to stand beside him. Minho glanced at the girl in surprise for a moment, then sighed.

"I don't know." He replied honestly, hating that he didn't have the answer. "But it can't be good." Alexandria nodded as though she understood. Which she couldn't possibly, Minho didn't even really understand. He didn't know what was happening and it bothered him. From the first day he came to stay here, he and Brenda had agreed not to keep secrets. They remained brutally honest at all times, and he was actually offended that she was keeping things from him now.

Minho moved away from Brenda and blocked her path out the front door. "What's going on?" He demanded her, eyes narrowing. Brenda looked like she wanted to lie, or order him out of the way. She did neither, though, and settled for simply saying her head.

"Min, I'm in a hurry." She told him, her voice shaking with nerves and emotion. Minho could see that the woman wanted to cry but simply refused to break down.

"Tell me what's going on, and you'll get out of here." Minho told her with a shrug. He wasn't going the rest of the night without knowing what was going on. He'd go insane.

Brenda shook her head. "You cannot tell anybody this, Minho, alright? Jorge and I decided it would be better if you didn't know until we had something permanent to tell you." Minho stared Brenda down, begging him to tell her. "Newt has attempted to commit suicide. It's very bad and the doctors aren't sure if he's going to make it through the night."

Brenda managed to push past Minho while he slumped against the wall in shock.

xxxx

"Newt." Thomas' voice came to him from a distance, just a little too far away for him to touch. Newt reached out, feeling that Thomas was there but he touched nothing. He was completely surrounded by darkness, and pain rained through him. It was the worst thing he'd ever felt.

"Newt. You have to hold on." Thomas' voice kept whispering. "Hold on. Just hold on. Don't leave. Don't ever leave me behind."


	18. Chapter 18

It wasn't completely dark, that was the first thing Newt noticed. It was a though something was being held over his eyes, and the room in which he was in was actually bursting with light.

"Isaac… Isaac…" The terrifying, all too familiar voice called out to him, freezing Newt to his very core. It may have been many years since he'd heard that voice, but he knew it was one he'd never forget.

It was his mother.

"Isaac, sweetie, come see Mummy." The voice continued to call out to him and Newt was sure that if he was capable of it, he'd be shaking. It seemed as though the whole room was getting brighter with every word his mother breathed to him. Like the hands were being taken from his eyes so he could see.

Or like he moving towards the light at the end of a tunnel.

xxxx

Minho stormed into the bedroom, taking one look at the surprised Thomas sitting on the bed and felt the anger rush through him all over again. "Don't even ask, Thomas. I'm not telling you anything."

Thomas blinked.

Minho grabbed the closest thing he could find- which happened to be the jar which the held the pencils on Thomas' desk- and chucked it towards the bedroom wall. Thomas jumped and looked at Minho wildly.

"What are you doing!" He cried, eyes wide in shock. Minho glared at him, the anger beginning to truly boil over.

"What happened to you at the party on Saturday?" Minho asked him, clearly catching Thomas off guard with the question. Thomas stammered and his face grew to a blush. "And don't you fucking try to lie to me, Thomas."

"Why does it matter?" Thomas asked, his voice breaking with unshed tears. He looked imploringly at Minho, begging him to throw him a bone, give him some sort of idea at what was happening.

"Shuck. It can't be a coincidence. You started acting all weird and secretive, then Newt-" Minho broke off, remembering at the last moment his promise to Brenda. That she had made him swear not to tell a soul. He looked at Thomas and noticed the boy pale.

Thomas' entire body went cold at Minho's words. "Then Newt what? Minho, what's happened to Newt?"

Minho shook his head. "Forget I said anything, Newt's as good as dead." Then he winced, because that had been too much. He'd say much too much.

Thomas jumped onto his feet. "What are you talking about? Minho, tell me _now."_ Thomas was shaking as he stepped closer to the Asian boy in front of him. Minho wasn't scared of Thomas in the slightest, but even he found the fire in his eyes slightly intimidating.

"You tell me first." Minho glared down at him, trying to sound more confident than he was feeling. The world seemed to be crashing in on him, and if Newt didn't make it through the night, then Minho didn't think he would either.

"Newt was at the party." Thomas replied, a slight look of guilt crossing his face. Minho swore under his breath and part of him wanted to stop Thomas was speaking. "I don't know why, he wouldn't really tell me. We did… things. Things that don't concern you."

"Don't concern me? Don't concern me!?!" Minho shouted, reaching out to grab the next closest thing- which happened to be his cell phone- and chucking it at the wall as well. "It sure as hell does concern me! Are you saying everything with Newt went well? He stuck around and you're boyfriends now, is that it?"

Thomas' eyes filled with tears but that only seemed to enrage Minho more. He couldn't believe that Thomas had been so stupid, he couldn't believe that Newt had let it happen, and he just couldn't fucking believe that this is what their lives had become.

"Thomas, I love a good fuck as much as anybody but NOT when it's putting lives at risk!"

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Thomas pleaded, causing something to snap within Minho. He grabbed hold of Thomas by the shirt and slammed him up against the wall.

"Minho!" Teresa's frantic shriek pierced his eardrums and irritated him more. "Minho! Let him go!"

Minho felt two strong pair of hands pull him away and knock him backwards onto the bed. Alby dropped himself down, pinned Minho's hands upwards, and straddled his waist. The two boys continued to struggle while Gally stepped backwards, breathing heavily.

"What is going on?" Teresa asked, sounding close to tears herself. She stepped closer to Thomas, who was leaning against the wall in shock, but he waved her away.

"Nothing. We're fine." Thomas said slowly, catching his own breath. "He wouldn't hurt me too badly."

"I should! I should kill you for this, slint head!" Minho yelled from the bed, fighting harder against Alby's grip. He almost managed to throw the boy off but then Gally was there, helping keep him down.

"Minho! Calm down!" Gally shouted into his face. "Tell what's going on! What's the fucking matter with you?"

"Newt. Newt… he…" Then Minho did something that couldn't've had been more surprising to anyone in the room. He started crying. Alby exchanged a nervously glance with Gally, who shrugged helplessly but neither boy released their grips on Minho.

Teresa stepped closer to Minho, away from a shell-shocked Thomas. "Minho. What's happening with Newt? You need to talk to us!"

"Newt's going to die. He's going to die and there's nothing we can do." Minho sobbed, not even trying to fight against Alby and Gally anymore. "We failed him, Thomas. We did this, you and me."

xxxx

"My sweet, sweet son."

Newt could see his mother now. The room he was in had lightened and he could see now that it wasn't a room at all, but rather a park. A park that was very similar to one near his house that he had never been able to go to as a child.

"My sweet, sweet son." Cristina Newton called to her son once again. Her blonde hair that so matched her sons blew behind her gracefully, as though the woman in front of him wasn't human. "Come. We have much to talk about."

"What could we possibly have to talk about?" Newt asked, surprising himself with his voice. He'd expected to sound young again, back the way he'd sounded the last time he'd spoken with his mother.

"You set out on a mission, my son. Surely you want the answers." She smiled sweetly; patting the set beside her that Newt swore hadn't been there moments earlier. He wanted to refuse, wanted to run from her but in the end his curiousity won out. The whole reason he was here was because he'd thrown away all the happiness in his life to get his answers. Might as well get them before it was all over.

Because he was dying, right? Or was he already dead? Newt wasn't sure, but his brain didn't allow time to dwell on this too long. He made quick movements and took the seat beside his mother, carefully to leave a safe distance between them.

"I'm sorry you had to find your father like that. I'm sure if was hard for you." Cristina told him gently. He reached out to stroke his hair but Newt quickly jerked away.

"Don't. I don't care about him being dead. Those weren't the answers I was looking for and you know it." Newt snapped, waving her hands away. Cristina smiled again, still seeming out of place.

"Of course they aren't, but you don't need the answers you were looking for." She informed him, her smile not wavering. "You never needed them, and it was foolish of you to go looking for them."

Newt blinked at her. "You aren't going to tell me?"

Cristina hummed. "Oh, I can tell you but you feel any satisfaction from it. Your father was an angry man- you knew that- and one night he couldn't stop himself. He killed me and then made a run for it."

Newt felt sick and fought the urge to look away from his mother. He forced himself to look her directly in the face.

"I suppose he figured that he could find you, finish you off as well and make a clean break start all over. But he wasn't as tough as he thought he was. Ran into a group of thugs, refused to give up his wallet, thought he could take them." Cristina laughed with all too much humour. "He was wrong. Your friend Aris found him not long after that."

Newt's body really was shaking now and held his mother's gaze none the less. He didn't want to admit that she was right, but couldn't deny it either. He felt nothing at this information and altogether felt like a waste.

"My son, you've wasted your time with this. It didn't matter to you because you had already moved on from the life your father and I had given you. You felt nothing but hatred for us, so the answers you went looking for meant nothing before they were even something." Cristina smiled and stroked his hair. This time, though, Newt let her too shocked to make her stop. "You threw away something very good to do something that didn't matter to you."

Newt looked at her for a long moment before speaking. "You said Dad killed you. Does that mean I'm dead, too? That I was successful in killing myself?"

Cristina smiled this one almost seeming sad. "That, my son, is still up for you to decide."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there's probably only about... three more chapters of this fic. I just feel like it's getting a little long so I'm tying up this plot line :3 Thanks to everybody who's been reading and I promise you badass Brenda in the next chapter ! <33


	19. Chapter 19

"There's really no reason for you to be here." Linda spoke to Brenda. "I've got this under control."

"Yes, certainly seems like it, doesn't it?" Brenda spit back, attempting to hold back as much of her rage as she could. There was something about this woman, something she couldn't exactly put her finger on, that made her mistrust her. Maybe it was the sight of Newt lying in a hospital post-stomach pumping, unable to breath of his own.

There were no signs of abuse, his seemed to be a very decent weight for his age and it didn't appear to be any unusual bruises or cuts. She knew, however, that Newt would only attempt to take his own life if he felt there was no other option for him. Which, yes, made her mistrust the woman sitting across from her. "Newt holds a very special place in my heart, I'm staying here until he wakes up."

"Are you implying that I do not care for the boy?" Linda asked, her voice raising octaves significantly. "Newt and I have bonded in ways you would never imagine."

That's when the warning bells started truly going off in Brenda's head and she vowed to keep a much closer eye on the woman whom had been taken care of the comatose boy that had once been full of love.

"I want to know what you did to him, but I don't think you're going to tell me anything." Brenda huffed angrily. She shot a dirty look towards the woman beside her. Linda had a good ten years on top of Brenda's age, but her being elder did not halt Brenda. Brenda was going to get her answers somehow, whether Linda would be aware of them now.

"Instead of asking what I did to him while he was in my care, why don't you ask yourself what you did to chase him to me?" Linda sent her a smirk- an actual smirk- before flipping through the magazine she held in her hands. She was being much too non-chalant about this for Brenda's liking.

Just as Brenda was deciding what to say, Jorge and the doctor came into the room. Jorge took one look at his wife and could see that she was getting close to blowing up. He shook his head subtly, a warning to keep her temper under control for a while longer.

Nobody knew better than Jorge did how much Brenda cared for the boy. He'd gone through a very similar event while he was still a social worker. Gotten attached to a child, watched everything fall apart. To this day he still couldn't speak of it, very much ten years in the past. It was still known as The Incident.

If Newt died, it would be worse than The Incident. Brenda had allowed Newt to live in her home, raised him as her own and yes, she'd given him to freedom to leave when he wanted to but she'd always assumed that he'd come home before long. Now the boy laid in a hospital bed, barely clinging to life after a suicide attempt and it seemed unlikely that he would ever come back. Brenda just hoped that Minho hadn't mentioned anything to the other kids, the last thing she needed was them getting worked up over something they had no control over.

"The stomach pump seemed to work well," The doctor told them with a slight nod. "Most of the toxins have left his body."

"What now?" Linda asked, a concerned expression settling over her features that made Brenda want to snap. How she could flip so easily between somebody who seemed unworried to concerned mother bothered Brenda greatly. There was something very off about this woman and Brenda was determined to find out what it was. What it was about her that made Newt's life so miserable that he wanted to end it; because Brenda knew that living with this woman was partly- if not completely- responsible for it. 

"I suppose we'll just have to wait it out. See how he responds to our treatment." The doctor spoke with finality before leaving the room. Jorge glanced down at the pale blond boy and actually smiled.

"What could you possibly be smiling about right now?" Brenda snapped at him in disbelief. Her husband, whose smiles had become so sacred for a long time, was smiling down at a boy whom would most likely die. It blew her mind, and pissed her off.

"The doctor didn't know how to say it without sounding like he didn't know what he was doing..." Jorge commented, his smile not dimming in the slightest. "But what he told was that there's nothing they can do anymore. If Newt's going to come back, it has to be his decision."

Brenda glanced nervously at the boy, praying to every god she'd never believed in, that he'd decide to come back.

xxxx

"Newt…. Newt!"

In this hell, whatever type of place it was, Thomas' voice rang out to him in every dark corner, screamed to him every time he tried to move somewhere that held light. Cristina was long gone, and Newt was alone. Well, alone with Thomas' voice.

"Newt, come back." Thomas called his voice dreamy and invisible. Newt clenched his fists tightly and glared at the dark direction where it came from.

"I'm trying!" He screamed back, knowing that Thomas wouldn't reply directly. Whatever was going on, the voice of Thomas couldn't hear his replies. "I'm bloody trying!"

"Don't go into the light, Newt." Thomas' voice called to him again and Newt couldn't hold back his eye roll.

"Thanks, Tommy, because that isn't bloody cliché or anything!" Newt yelled, irritation leaking into every word. "If you insist on being here and talking, could you at least be a little helpful?"

"Don't go into the light, Newt." Thomas said again, invoking a growl from Newt.

"Useless shank."

xxxx

"I'm telling you, Jorge, she did something to him!" Brenda hissed to her boss in the hospital corridor.

Janson shook his head. "We already looked into this Garcia, I assure you. No reason to believe there is any sort of abuse happening in that home."

"Abuse doesn’t always leave physical signs, you know that!" Brenda fought against the urge to stomp her foot like a child.

"None the less, we won't know anything unless Isaac wakes up." Janson bit his lip, almost looking genuinely concerned.

"And if he does, he's coming home with me." Brenda spat at him. "I don't care if I have to kidnap him from the goddamn hospital myself."

"Yes, that's a very good way to lose your other children, Garcia, well done."

"I don't care. We'll all go together." Brenda spun around and stomped back into the room. She caught sight of Linda seated on Newt's bed, hand rested on his leg. Too high on his leg.

"Oh, fuck no." Brenda breathed out, moving over and grabbing Linda by the hair on the back of her head. She spun the woman around and slammed her against the wall. "You've been touching him?"

"What's wrong with you?" Linda gasped out, fear settling on her face. Brenda just gripped her tightly and glared with all the hatred her heart could muster.

"Did. You. Touch. Him." She hissed in her face, hands tight on the woman's blouse.

"Garcia!" Janson yelped as he rushed into the room, Jorge right on his tail. Together the two man managed to pry Brenda away, her hands swinging.

"You're a lunatic!" Linda gasped at her, rubbing her neck nervously. "You're crazy!"

"Tell the truth! Tell the truth!" Brenda screamed, knowing that nurses would be on the way now. "You touched him! Tell the truth!"

A certain darkness passed through Linda's face before she glanced to the ground. When she finally looked back up, there was smile on his face that sent shiver through Brenda's entire body.

"It does not matter what you people think." Linda said her voice sweet and too light. "Isaac and I are in love. He will awaken and come back to me."

In their shock at the confession, Janson and Jorge made the mistake of losing their grip on Brenda. She had the elder woman tackled to the ground in a single moment.

xxxx

"Newt! You've got to listen to me!" Thomas kept calling making tears burn in Newt's eyes.

"Go away!" Newt shouted back, covering his ears. "Either help me or go away!"

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming back?" The simple sentence sent a wave of despair through Newt. The night that had been the final turning point, when Newt realized he couldn't live the life he'd given himself anymore. "Newt?"

Newt froze where he was, squeezing his eyes shut, and willing Thomas' voice to just go away.

"Newt from the day I meant you, there hasn't been a single moment where I didn't want to see you."

"Please stop." Newt begged, feeling the tears dripping down his face. "Just leave me alone. Anything would be better than this, please!"

"The door. I didn't close the door!"

Something clicked in Newt now. The door… he didn't close the door. Newt slowly turned around, silently pleading for it to be there. And it was.

A single door, swung open. The other side looked just as dark, if not darker, than where he was standing now. However, something deep inside Newt told him that he needed to go through the door. That things would sort themselves out if he went through it.

"You could finish me off now. I'll be ready to go again in a few minutes anyway."

Newt stood in front of the door, narrowing his eyes. He didn't know what was behind it but the urge to go through was almost painful. He had to do it- it was the only thing he could do, he needed to get back to Thomas.

So he stepped through the door frame.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And Newt survives! Not surprising, I'm no James Dashner I would never be able to kill our baby Newt :D 
> 
> Also one more chapter you guys.... I can't believe this.


	20. Chapter 20

Thomas ran down the hospital corridor as fast as his leg would carry him. He skidded to a stop in front of room 317 and froze. Newt was sitting up in the bed, looking pale and little bit shaken, but alive.

He was _alive._

Thomas burst into the room and fought every urge in his body to throw himself onto Newt in the bed. Hold him tightly until he was forced let go. Brenda had called once things had been cleared up, and the horrible woman that had taken Newt's freedom away had been taken. Once Newt was feeling more up to it, he'd have to give his statement to the police but luckily they weren't demanding it yet. They could hold under what Brenda, Jorge and Mr Janson had told them and what she'd seemed to confess.

Thomas hoped she'd confess to everything so that Newt wouldn't have to relive what she'd put him through, but he knew that was just wishful thinking and wouldn't actually happen. Nobody just confesses to those sorts of horrible crimes, and always left a horrific mess behind them.

"Hey, Tommy." Newt's weak, scratchy voice pulled Thomas from his thoughts. His eyes widened and he bounced over to the chair beside Newt's bed and dropped down into it.

"Don't you dare pull something like that again!" Thomas cried, his hands still shaking. He was aware that tears were starting to form in his eyes, but he couldn't bring it in himself to care. He'd almost lost Newt- really, truly lost him- and he would cry if he damn well felt like it.

Brenda glanced between the two boys and took hold of Jorge's hand. "We've got to go get your stuff from that house, Newt. You're coming back to live with us."

Both boys nodded, although Thomas wondered shortly what would happen to Chuck. If he'd be forced out of the room or if Newt would be sleeping somewhere else. However, if Thomas knew Newt at all, he would never kick somebody out of their bed even if it had been his bed first. And Thomas suspected that Newt would get along very well with Chuck and they didn't need any sort of bad blood between them.

"Don't do anything like that again." Thomas repeated once Brenda and Jorge had exited, leaving the boys alone. Newt smiled at him- a genuine smile that Thomas had missed so dearly- and it sent a wave of happiness through Thomas. Things might just be okay after all.

"Don't need to worry about me, Tommy." Newt assured him, his voice still sounding hoarse. "I'm coming home with you. I might not be 100 percent… I may never be 100 percent again… but things are already turning around."

Thomas finally gave into his urges, and crawled into the bed beside Newt. He tucked his head underneath Newt's shoulder and sighed happily when he left an arm wrapped about him.

"You're what guided me back, you know that?" Newt told him sleepily. Thomas shifted slightly so that he could look into Newt's brown eyes. Newt smiled at him and pressed a kiss to Thomas' temple. "Everywhere I turned, I could hear your voice. I think following your voice was the only thing that got me back. Without it, I would have died."

Tears prickled Thomas' eyes again and he buried his face further into Newt's chest. "I don't know what I would have done if you'd died. I don't think I could have handled it."

Newt didn't answer for a long time and when he finally did, it wasn't in reply to what Thomas had told him. "I didn't lie to you, by the way."

"What?" Thomas asked, pulling away once more. The expression on Newt's face was so serious that he had to sit up fully and actually look down at him. "You didn't lie about what?"

"When I left I told you to write me everyday, and that I'd keep all the letters." Newt said almost sheepishly, a small blush growing on his cheeks. "I know you probably think that I lied to you since I ever answered your letters, but I want you to know that I didn't lie, Tommy. I kept them all, even the ones where you were angry at me. When Brenda and Jorge get all my things, I'll show you them."

Thomas shook his head. "I don't need to see them, Newt, I wrote them. I know what they say; I probably remember them word for word."

"Well then I'll show you the letters I wrote in reply but never got the nerve to send." Newt said slowly, brushing a hand through his hair. "I told you everything, too, Tommy… I just…"

"You don't have to explain." Thomas said, wrapping his arms fully around Newt's mid-section carefully, realizing that having your stomach pumped was probably very painful. "And you don't have to tell me anything you're not ready to."

"Kay…" Newt said, yawning slightly. Thomas glanced up at him again, and smiled at the sleepy expression on his face.

"Are you falling asleep on me, Newt?" Thomas asked, with an eyebrow cock. It almost felt like old times- _almost._

"You try coming out of a coma, and tell me how great you feel." Newt snapped at him, but his words held no menace. Whether it was because he couldn't be mad at Thomas or because he was already falling asleep, Thomas wasn't entirely sure.

"Whatever. Go to sleep then." Thomas said with a smile. He wasn't really annoyed, he and Newt now had forever to talk. So Thomas watched Newt's eyes close and smiled again at how peaceful Newt looked as he drifted off to sleep.

"Well ain't that just adorable." Minho's voice carried from the doorway, causing Newt to jump and Thomas to groan.

"Man, can't you ever be quiet?" Thomas asked him as Minho walked over to them with a smirk.

"Sorry, boys. Only got one volume, you know that." Then he sat down on the bed with them and really did start to feel like old times.


End file.
